tear myself apart (billieeilish&tatemcrae)

two

23rd april 2019 (continued)

its time. we just met up with my manager and are heading to the studio in the van. i have no idea what to do with myself, i'm sweaty because i'm nervous. i'm an anxious person but never usually this bad. i think it's because i don't know what to expect, or really what's happening to be honest.

"so are they at the studio already?" my mom questions my manager, who gives her a nod and a thumbs up.

"yeah we're kind of a little bit late because of the food in the airport but it's ok, they don't mind" he explains. oh that's great, makes me feel so much better that were late as well. fuck.

"there it is, one of the most famous recording studios in los angeles" my dad pipes up. shit were here.

the van pulls up, the driver opening the doors for us. i shove my hands in my hoodie pocket and follow everyone inside, my head fixed down to the floor as we head up some stairs.

as soon as i walk through the door i am met with a tall, strawberry blonde haired guy. finneas.

"you must be tate, it's so nice to meet you" he says, giving me a hug which i awkwardly expects

"thank you for having me" i says, kinda gaining a little confidence. but when a familiar blue haired girl comes in the room all that goes, my stomach beginning to do flips. i look at her, the way her baggy sweatpants and hoodie hang off her small body, the goofy smile on her face as she looks at us. she is kind of everything i expected her to be, in a good way.

i snap out of my thoughts when she appears right in front of me after speaking to my manager.

"hey tate, thank you for being here dude" she says, giving me a small hug, seeming just as awkward as i am. i take a deep breath once her arms are around me, taking in her comforting scent.

"i'm happy to be able to sing one of your songs, i'm sure it's amazing" i add kindly, trying to make an impression.

::
billie's pov

i kinda just lost all ability to speak when i saw tate. i had to talk to her manager first instead to sort myself out. dude she is one the most beautiful people i have ever seen. her tanned complexion, her long wavy hair falling over her green hoodie.

i didn't know who tate was before this, but i'm happy i do now. plus she seems really sweet so i think i'm going to enjoy this.

"ok you guys head in, we will leave you too it" her manager explains, making tate pull a nervous expression when she realises that they are all leaving her. she seems nervous, which i don't like because i want to get to know her personality.

finneas leads us into the studio, tate strolling behind at the back. i hold the door open for her and she sends me a smile as she walks through, looking around at all the machines.

"so what do you do when your not singing?" i ask the brunette girl, trying to break the awkwardness. she leans herself on a table opposite me as she thinks about the question.

"i'm a dancer" she tells me and i raise my eyebrows.

"i can tell" i say looking at her toned figure, which i'm pretty sure made her blush. "what type of dancing do you do".

"pretty much anything, i stated off doing ballet when i was like 4, but now i do anything, hip hop, contemporary, whatever" she explains and i nod with intrigue.

"ok guys so i think today we should sort out the melody, i'm pretty sure i have the piano sorted but tate i want your input on it too" finneas tells us.

i nod standing next to him at the keyboard looking at the piece of paper with all the notes and chords on. tate comes up beside me, focusing her eyes on the lyrics on her note pad.

"what was the melody meant to be like?" she asks. i begin playing the piano keys, humming along with how it was meant to go. i look at her and nod as i approach the chorus bit.

she licks her lips and takes a deep breath. "can you feel my hands shake, heart is now an earthquake, i'm left alone to tear myself apart, you make it look so easy, turn around and leave me, i'm left alone to tear myself apart. tear myself apart" she begins singing, her voice softer as she sings a more stripped back version.

i watch her, feeling mesmerised, she has an amazing voice.

"that sounded good" finneas says as i stop playing the piano.