Alaska: I cook to cope and ignore my extreme anxiety attacks!
Washington: but... but you cook so much-
Alaska: YEA NO DUH WASHINGBITCH
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alaska: America, why can Texas try to become his own country but I can't?
America: cause if I loose him you're my only other good source of oil-
Alaska: OH SO YOURE USING ME?! TEXAS TAKE ME WITH YOU!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alaska: I play video games to cope with my trauma!
Indiana: well you must have a lot of trauma cause you play a ton of video games-
Alaska: YEA NO SHIT SHERLOCK!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mass: hey Pumpkin~.... *horny idiot*
Alaska: *asexual panic* no. Out of the house. Now. Begone Satan-
Mass: darnit! >:(
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alaska, in drag: I'mma fight these gender norms!
Transphobes and homophobes: *publicly shame him*
Alaska, shakily: damn... t-these gender norms got h-hands!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alaska: I have an idea-
Mass: no murder.
Alaska: .... I no longer have an idea
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alaska: *tries to throw paper ball in trash can* YEET! *misses*
RE: you tried your best Yeetska-
Alaska: dad... never say that ever again-
RE: wasn't planning on it.
YOU ARE READING
At this point it's just a shitpost book
فكاهةAll hells about to break loose ↪️If your reading/seeing this on a site that isn't Wattpad, my book probably go copy and pasted onto an unsafe fan fiction app page↩️
