Fiancé for hire

6. why me?

It's been 3 months to the last incident and that thought crossed my mind everyday. Exactly at 11 AM everyday  I've been looking at the glass doors hoping to see Max enter one day. But I know that after what I did he was not going to come back.

Vi has been asking me why I feel so down. But I don't want to share my problems with her and make her a part of them. I needed someone who was there for everything I did in life. Someone who would value my dreams,my goals and most importantly value ME and my presence.

Isn't it weird that when everything is going smoothly in our lives we think that they will be smooth forever and then suddenly one day everything comes to an end. All relationships break up either because you are complicated or either because the other one doesn't care enough to know why are you complicated.

I was waiting on the counter looking at the customers who were happy with their own lives. Some were busy working, some were laughing with their friends and some of them were so in love that they did not care about their surroundings.

I was snapped out of my thoughts by Vi. "Hey ally (Alyssa's nickname) I've got some work today and uh I won't be able to walk you home. Can you lock the door by yourself today?".
"Yeah sure don't worry" I gave her a small smile and she returned with a grin.

I was cleaning the shelves in the pantry when I felt a hand on my lower back. It felt weird. I looked up to the stranger and it was my Boss. "Uh hey Ben". I said. "Hey Alyssa". Was he drunk?  He spoke in a very unusual tone. "Are you alright Ben?".
"Yea I am. You look so good today". I could feel his hands creeping up to my waist.

My back was against the wall and I was trapped between him and the wall and there was no way to escape. His breath smelled of alcohol. It was very strong. I sensed that something was was off. I felt uncomfortable under his touch. "Honey you smell so sweet". His face was almost near me and I could feel his breath on my neck. He was breathing pretty fast.

"Sir what are you trying to do" I tried to push him away. "Shh keep it low. Seems like you are working hard. I want to reward you with something". He smirked. My body froze and I could hear my heartbeat." S-sir you are not in your right mind. P-please let me go" He tightened his grip on me and said "do what I say if you want to keep this job". I was screaming from inside but my voice didn't Come out.

He slowly leaned in and was about to kiss me when I smacked him hard on the face. I could clearly see my handprint on his pale skin. Wow I didn't know I was capable of this. Good job Ally.

I was lost in my own thoughts when i saw him approaching me and before I could run away he pushed me into the wall and held his hand on my neck trying to choke me. I had given up.

He looked me in the eye and said "one taste is all that I want". He was kissing my jaw line. I wanted to say no but I didn't know how. He was busy kissing my neck when I gained some confidence and looked ahead of me staring at a wine bottle.

I pushed him away with all the power I had in me. To be honest with you  I have a petite body. My hands are small and I'm short. Not very short but short. Maybe 5'3. I pushed him away and he lost his balance and fell on the ground. It was difficult for him to get up. This was my chance.

I ran upto the wine bottle and picked it up in my hands. As soon as Ben approached me I hit him in the head with the wine bottle. The bottle broke into pieces and the wine was all on his expensive coat. I could see blood trickling down his forehead .

But after what he was about to do with me i think he deserved it. I gathered all my belongings as fast as I could and ran out of the cafe. I reached home and locked the door.

It had almost been 30 mins since I came home. My belongings were all scattered on the floor and I was sitting  with my back faced towards the door and My head was in my palm. I was crying my eyes out thinking what could have happened today .

That was when I realised that nobody other than you yourself can keep you safe. But at times I think how would life be if I had a family or only if I had someone who could help get off this phase. I've lost my job again. I was not going back to that toxic place. Why is it me who always has to go through all  hardships in life and then in the end there's nothing but pain and pain only.

I walked upto my bed and slept on an empty stomach deep in my own thoughts. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep thinking about being alone and being misunderstood or no one understanding you at all. Have you ever looked at the mirror and found one thing that you liked about yourself.? All these thoughts were going inside my head and eventually I fell asleep.
      
                    .................................
Chapter 6. Word count 957 words. This chapter was kinda hard cuz I've never really written about sexual assaults and stuff. But my advice to y'all is that if anyone of you faces it be it a girl or a boy don't keep quiet. Tell someone about it and raise your voice. Uh I'm kinda thinking about deleting this book cuz something has been going on and I'm not in my right State of mind.
 
Now idk if I'll see y'all soon. peace ✌🏻
Shoutout to - yagami_yumeko. Ily❤️