Letters to Spencer Reid

25: tell me you love me again

"Fuck!" Spencer shouts from the kitchen instantly waking you up. Adjusting your eyes from the blinding light, you glance around the room, a sleepy Spencer nowhere to be found. You roll out of bed adjusting the covers as you do, making the comforter and pillow neat. Tiptoeing out of the bedroom yawning, Spencer is making breakfast at— 6:32 am.

We still have like another hour of sleep Spence, cmon. Let me go back to bed damnit.

"Hey," you approach catching his attention. "You didn't have to make breakfast. We could've just got something along the way."

"I know, but I didn't mind." Spencer replies avoiding any eye contact. You lean against the kitchen counter watching him attempt at scrambling eggs. "Maybe we could just get something because—"

"Here, let me." You assert pushing him aside taking over. "You had the right intentions, but are using the wrong techniques." You chuckle lightly noticing his demeanor. He's avoiding eye contact, slowly backing away, and is clearly very uncomfortable. You let it slide hoping it's just from a lack of sleep, finishing the eggs and placing them onto plates.

"Here you go sir." You chuckle pushing the plate lightly in his direction, his face staying emotionless taking a bite, still avoiding your presence. You take a bite looking at him waiting for a conversation to begin; there never is one. Dropping your fork on the plate, you manage to catch his attention.

"Okay, what is up with you today? Did I do something?" You ask tilting your head slightly offended.

"What? No— no you didn't do anything." Spencer finally looks at you before averting his eyes almost instantly back onto his plate.

"Really?" You wait a moment for a reply, still getting dead silence from your end. You rush over to hip cupping his cheeks moving his face to yours. "Spencer, what's going on?"

Spencer grips your wrists removing your hands from his face, averting his gaze again. "I had a dream, alright?"

"A dream? What happened?" You question leaning next to him.

"Nothing happened." He scoffs finishing up his plate, bringing it to the sink as you follow.

"Clearly something did because you can't even look at me. Oh— did I kill you? Or was I an unsub? Spence I'm so sorry." You rest your hand on his shoulder before he flinches backing away.

"Stop! You didn't kill me okay? That's not why—" he stops walking back into his room. You stay in the kitchen questioning what just happened, then chase after him.

"It was a sex dream, wasn't it?" You ask as he rustles angrily through his closet looking for an outfit. You lean against the door frame analyzing his every movement trying to read him.

"Stop profiling me." He scoffs finally picking an outfit and throwing it on the bed.

"I wouldn't have to if you just told me what's going on!" You exclaim walking towards him finally making eye contact. "Why can't you just tell me?" You whisper cupping his face again, assuring full eye contact.

"It made me uncomfortable. I don't want to relive it, that's why I can't tell you." He whispers grabbing a light hold of your waist, his face instantly showing some sort of pain. You search his eyes for a moment before wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug.

"Don't do something you don't want to. I'll let it go. I just wanted to make sure you're okay." You pull away cupping his cheeks quickly before pulling them away completely. "Now go shower! We have to get to work soon." You insist managing to receive a smile from him as he heads into the bathroom.