Hidden Desire

Chapter 13

Adira POV

I walk down the stairs into the kitchen. I see Damien, he has returned. "Damien?" I say surprised. He smiles, sighing and pulling me into an embrace. "Hello love, how are you doing?" I smile, his scent surrounding me with comfort, settling me with ease. "I'm doing good Damien, how was your trip?" I ask. He sits on the countertop as he does everytime. "Lots of people are sick in the North." I frown at his words. "They cannot afford the medicine and I am not permitted to give them it without payment." 

I flinch at the thought. "How many people?" I ask in hope. "Around 1500." I gasp. "How much for the medicine?" I ask, biting my lip. "20 coins a piece." I stare at him in horror, my eyes start tearing up. He pulls me into another embrace. "I need to go, i'll be back." I say, releasing from his tight grip. He seems saddened, "I missed you." I say, trying to lighten the mood. He smiles, his eyes glistening.

"Honey!" I shout looking for Silus. He appears out fo the shower in a towel. "Whats up my dear?" I sit on the bed, drying his hair with another towel. "I know what I want for my birthday." He seems excited, happy that I'm finally asking for something. "It's a lot to ask for though." He shrugs. "Anything for you, what is it?" I sigh, "30,000 coins." He stares at me in surprise. "30,000 coins? Thats it?" I stare at him in disgust. he did not just say "that's it?"

I nod my head and he shrugs. "Sure sweetie but you have to ask for more." I nod and kiss him. "Thanks honey." I sprint down stairs trying to find Damien. I bump into him and look up. "I'm having deja vu." He smiles and looks confused why I looked like a sprinted, which I did. "I'll buy all the medicine for the 1500 people." He steps back and looks at me. "What?" "I will buy the 1500 medical vaccines for the North Village." He smiles and puts his head in his hands. "You are ridiculous, where did you even get that money?" 

I stare at him sternly. He opens his mouth in shock. "you're not kidding?" I shake my head seriously. he starts to laugh. "Stop laughing jerk!" is out at him. the stops, wiping the tears form his eyes. "Oh how I've missed you." I feel a warmth in my stomach with those words, if only he knew how I longed for his touches, kisses and even his voice. "Can you do that for me?" I ask. He looks at my lips for a quick second and then at the ceiling,"I think I can do that." I squealed and hugged him.

"Thank you so much." I kissed him on the cheek and then realised what I did. "Adira...." I nod my head, "I know you're in love with that girl and that's okay." I smile, knowing my heart was torn . He smiles sadly and caressed my cheek, I lean into his touch, closing my eyes. "I never loved her Adira." I look at him hoping. Just say those three word sand I'm yours. Three simple words.

"I-" hes interrupted. 'Adira my dear!" I pull his hand away from my face and stare at Silus. "I was thinking about our wedding date sweetie." I frowned for a moment, remembering i'm tied to him for a little while. "What type of wedding did you want?" How could I be so stupid and allow my feelings almost interfere with my plans. My mother would be so disappointed in me if she were here. "Dear?" I look to him and he is not at the bottom of the stairs. He stares at Damien.

"When did you get back brother?" Damien smiles' can see him holding back the sadness. "Just this morning." Silus gives him and hug and then walks to my side."We're getting married! She is due to be the next queen!" Damien smiles and looks at me. "It suits you." his voice was full of fake happiness. "Thank you." my voice was harsh and emotionless. Silus wrapped his arm around my waist and both Damien and I flinched.

We both knew how I felt about Silus and how we felt about each other. "Silus darling can you please ask Suzy if we have any letters from the duchesses yet? They wanted another tea party." Silus nods and runs off like a small child. I stare at Damien and his broken eyes. "Not meaningless sex huh." he says. My heart aches for him. He stares into my eyes and fro the first time my eyes start to tear up. The tears flood from my eyes and down my cheek. 

my expression doesn't change but Damien sees what he's done. He reaches his hand out but I walk away from him and towards the garden. It's the only safe place for me now. I walk into the maze and sit where I once sat powerful and in control. I let my tears run down on my Dress and let the ache of my heart spread. I felt like the air had been punched out of me and my heart was being shattered with a hammer like glass. My face is touched, the warmth spreads through my cheeks and I look up to see him.

His golden eyes that spark pain stare deeply into mine. I sit on his lap, his warm, comforting arms, surrounding me like a shield, protecting me from the heart break. "Meaningless?" I ask him. Not knowing what else to say. He stares at me and shakes his head, lightly kissing my forehead. "No, it was special." I smile slightly, kissing his jaw. He looks down at me teary eyes and wipes them. "How are you still beautiful when you cry?" 

I feel his heartbeat, steady as a falling tide, his heat melting me. "I love you." the words spill out of my mouth like a flood, the waves carrying the weight off of me and into the ocean of tears. "What?" he asks. I realise I said it. The one thing I never thought I would say to anyone and I said it. He stared at me with open eyes, I smiled and looked at him once more. "Damien, I love you." He smiled, the cutest and sweetest smile I had ever seen. He hugged me tighter and whispered In my ear "I love you too." I felt complete.