Twilight Remastered: Rekindled

4

Edwards finds bella standing in the middle of the forest staring at nothing for dramatic effect but really shes trying to concentrate on holding in her poop. Edward slowly creeps up behind her and then touches her on her shoulder whispering in her ear "every rape starts with a touch on the shoulder". Bella farts and cums and then says out of breath even tho she didnt do anything to make her out of breath " i know who are, I know your an immortal being of unimaginable mythical power, whose mere existence is incomprehensible to modern science, but the plot is telling me to fuck you because some horny 35 year old woman had fever dream."
Edward pog faces and shouts
"LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
Bella and ed are sharing this magical moment and in the background you can hear minecraft manhunt music playing in the background and very faintly hearing frightend english screaming followed by "COME HERE GEORGE"
Bella and edward seem unfazed cause they already seen that episode of minecraft manhunt.

Edward begins skipping through the woods towards a ray of light shining suspicously close by he turns around flexing his arms so hard his shirts pops off him like a super ultra mega chad 3000. In reponse bella melts into a puddle of nickolden slime and stares up to edwards whos glistening in the sun like a man whos covered in litterally glitter dot dot dot and he is litterally covered in glitter. Edwards skin is lichrally glitter and as bella continues to be mesmerized and his skin flakes and flies towards her like a fuckin Indian/Russian BrahMos missile, currently the fastest operational supersonic missile capable of speeds around 2,100–2,300 mph, which hits her in her only good eye. The glitter cut her iris and she is now blind in both eyes. A second eyepatch fizzes into existance over her second eye and now has two eyepatches. This is a perfect example of how glitter is very dangerous. Glitter can be something fun to prank your friends with but can also can easily stuck in their eyes. if inhaled it can cause irritation to the lungs, and if made from certain metals, it is toxic and can kill you. For all of these reasons you should be very careful with glitter and do not let childern play with it unsupervised.

Edward and bella were waiting paitently for the psa, they frolic back through the forest bht edward has to carry her cause she keeps tripping and falling cause shes blind.