Twilight Remastered: Rekindled

5

After about 5 mins of running in circles edwin gets a lil slweepy from carrying bella so they bith t pose in a patch of homosexaul flowers. One of the flowers used to be a boy scout leader. As edward and bella have their staring contest barry bee benson licks his werid yellow lips at bella then flies and asks "you like jazz?" Bella acting out of pure instict pulls her lightsaber/massager that she bought from spencers from her belt and slices barry in half while shouting "COUNTRY LIFE!!!!" Edward has a seizure in bellas victroy and then both of them do the worm towards the cliff edge as they both sit on the cliff edge staring out to the amber sunset glistening across the treetop horizon and against the pink hued clouds. edward slowly creeks his neck towards bella and whispers to her
"Have you ever heard the tale of darth carlilse the wise"

bella, the blind fuck she is was not able to see the sunset so she was thinking about sorting algorithms and virgously shakes her head like shes at a radiohead concert.

Edward begins morshu beat boxing expostion which is the only other langauge bella understands. After he runs out of breath he grabs bella and jumps into the next scene.
When he jumps onto bellas truck he dents it and he it becomes more mentally retraded, with a notable "DUUUUH"
Edward and bellas characther nodes cease to exist and they both ragdoll off the top of the truck but befores long their nodes come back and they get up
Edward affectionatley strokes the truck hood and asks if she "motherfucker wanna fuckin come to my house for dinner????"
Bella is concerned she smells too much like the walmart shoe section so she is hestiant to reply
"but..but..but what if they dont like meeeeeee 🥺"
Edward is like "nonsense if they can eat bean paste covered in vegimite theyll like you"
Bella gasps while slapping herself in the face " i didnt know everyone in your family was classy as you"
Edward responds with "ye"
But before edward can say anything more he think he smells the eloteis man and just then the disabled guy rolls up with his shirtless in a weiner mobile that off the back a hot dog package playing the armor hotdog song.
Jacob and edward exchange nonsexual stares.
The disabled guy backflips out of the weiner mobile into his wheelchair after he finished driving his weiner mobile.
"I dont know about you weiner but im gonna go watch the football game." And he tokyo drifts into the house.
Jacob virgin walks into the house because he isnt cool and disabled like his dad.