Lover of Words

Twelve

3am problems (2)

it's her
isn't she?
all your songs about,
your love
your pain
how fortunate could it be
to be someone you love
because that's all I ever wanted
it's too frustrating
that I have to convince myself
I am not her
I am just not her
it's like an unending internal battle
I feel too pathetic
for even thinking
when I have always known
that I was never
the one
maybe it's those videos to blame
maybe it's my stupid emotions
maybe it's my wishful thinking
and I am wishing my life away
I don't know what I'm waiting
but I feel like waiting in vain
if you read this
maybe you'll pity me
maybe you'll hate me
the girl who can't seem to accept
all the things she already understand
but please,
she is trying
so hard
and one day, perhaps,
maybe she'll eventually
give her own freedom