SIRENIC || KTH

14. Losing Myself

Kathy's pov:

It has been seven days of Kaira treating me with numerous medicines. Seven days of no ties with the outer world. Seven days of only encountering two faces, Doctor Kai and... Kim Taehyung.

While Kai only stays with me during the supposed treatment, Taehyung is the one to always be near me. He's the one to take care of all my basic needs. And very rarely do our bodies make accidental contact even though he does spend an excess of time with me. He has started indulging me with chocolate every now and then, or an extra blanket when the chill is too much. I think it's all a way of reminding me... I'm not a guest.

I feel as if I've been addicted to the chocolate he brings, and the blanket that provides me warmth.

Who is this man? Who is Kim Teahyung? I can never figure it out. He seems so gentle, even if he's not. He's patient when I take forever to complete simple tasks like bathing he must oversee. Yet I sense that powerful brutality lurking beneath his benign facade; a brutality I instinctively know I must evade.

My chain of thoughts break when Kai places a soft kiss on my forehead. "You've been recovering quite rapidly," she says while massaging my head with her fingers.

Smiling back at her, I speak, "All thanks to you, Kai."

"At this rate, you are fit enough to get out of this room by tomorrow itself. And I'm worthy enough to get my reward too." The glint in her eyes speak a story I could never think of.

"That means I'll be able to see you more often. Don't worry about your reward, I'll make sure to pay you back for the favor." I held her hand with my own, as she sat beside me on the bed.

"I'm not sure if we will meet more often since you're to be taken care by Tae himself, in his bedroom. About repaying, don't you worry, you can never repay. My reward lies with Joon. He's the only one to decide if I'm worth it." Pausing for a split second, Kaira glances at the door. "Buddy, I'll take my leave. Mostly by morning, I'll come back to shift you. Till then-"

Before she can complete, the door opens revealing Taehyung. "Am I interrupting something?" He asks and Kaira backs off from the bed.

She scoffs, leaving the room without answering. It baffles me to see how she can literally disobey someone so powerful however she pleases.

Shaking it off, Taehyung enters with a cheeky grin spread across his face. "Time for sleep," he says.

"Now are you ready to answer all my questions?" I ask. Thinking about all of this renews my fear. It terrifies me as I don't have much interest in fleeing from his grip anymore.

He starts, almost as if he's surprised by the question. He sighs before speaking, "If you're so eager, then go ahead."

Fearless, I attack him with the very first one. "Who is the real leader of Kim syndicate? Why did Namjoon say that he's the one ruling, whereas Peril only knows about you?"

Taehyung looks at me with certainty as he answers, "Joonie is my step-brother, and together we are equally in power. All the decisions are discussed among us before acting upon. While I'm the face of Kim's, he's more like the shadow, a shadow which has not been revealed yet, but will surely come to light at the right time."

The new found information doesn't budge me, I know the questions I have are much more impactful than this mere one.

"I thought so... Where is Jimin, and why aren't you letting him see me?" I enquire while getting out of bed.

Taehyung moves forward to help me get on my feet. His tight grip on my arm and shoulder is scary and soft at the same time. "If I'm being honest, he has severe injuries. So, we won't be able to meet him till next week. And if I'm trusting Kai, then Jimin will be able to run marathons after he recovers."

Relieved about Jimin, I push Taehyung's hand away and stand facing him. "I don't want to know what incomplete business Namjoon has with Rupert. But that Joshua guy was repeatedly asking me something about an envelope. Can you throw light on it?"

As if pleased by me, Taehyung steps closer. Looking at me with the same gaze of a predator, he speaks, "The envolope consists of a little piece of paper which has confidential information about Rupert. If this paper is found by the defence authorities, it can cause the Rupert's to be fully destroyed. They will be dead in no time."

"Why does he think that I may know about the envolope?"

Again, the look on his face is confusing me. "Because the envolope originally belongs to your brother."

Clenching my fists tightly, until my nails dig into the palm of my hand. The sound of my heart throbbing against the cage of my chest. I'm aware that I'm biting my lip so badly it has started bleeding. All of this is not out of anger, but fear. "Jungkook?"

"Yes, your brother, Jeon Jungkook. He had collected proof of drugs and organ trafficking." As soon as Taehyung finishes his statement, the truth dawns on me.

I speak with conviction, "Jungkook was gathering information about human trafficking that was happening in the hospital. But it has been a year we discussed that, he had promised me he would not indulge in that matter."

"Your brother clearly made a false promise... I solely helped Rupert to kill Jungkook inorder to return a help he provided me a few years ago. Even after killing Jungkook, I haven't given the envelope to Rupert, so he thinks you might be aware about it, and that is why he's after your life now."

A heavy sigh leaves my mouth. "Rupert wants to kill me, you want to save me. You have nothing to do with me, then why can't you let me go?"

His viscous laugh is the only response I receive before he starts speaking, "You haven't gotten the dynamics of our relationship down yet, have you? Let me explain it to you... We're involved, Kath, very involved. You're mine, and your problems are also mine. No one messes with what belongs to me. Don't fight me on that, because you'll lose, baby."

Silence is all I reply with. How do I even respond to his weird obsession?

I do not fight back or question.

"It's time for bed," he says, waiting for me until I'm in bed and under the covers before he flips the lights off.

Before I can say goodnight with sarcasm, he's locked me in. How macabre this little pantomime of ours is. He tucks me into bed, his little prisoner.

In the middle of the night he creeps in, obviously assuming I'm asleep. His cool hand touches my forehead. If he's looking for a fever, he doesn't find one.

I wonder if I'm hallucinating when I feel him push back my hair in something that almost feels like tenderness.

Then I feel him poking around my wounds. I'm not sure how he can make anything out in the blanket of darkness surrounding us.

He must be satisfied, however, because he leaves immediately after.

And I can't deny that I play the information all over and over again in my mind until morning.

In the morning, I smash the mirror in the bathroom and cut my wrist with a shard. I'm not suicidal, may be, but I do have a masochistic streak, it would seem.

I tell myself it's to annoy Taehyung, but secretly I just want to see what he'll do.

In the initial minutes, he's rough with me. He catalogues the immense flow of blood flowing from my wrist, the puddle at my feet, the paleness of my face. "Shit. What did you do?"

He tugs me out of the bathroom. I'm shaking by the time he pushes me down on the bed.

"Stay," he orders, as if I could go anywhere else.

He leaves the room only to return a minute later with a first-aid kit.

I can't repress a laugh.

Upon receiving a glare, I clear my throat.

"You really need stitches." He treats me. It stings terribly, but it's what I deserve. Or so he keeps telling me.

I lay out to rest and he vanishes. The pain is exquisite and I don't quite sleep again, drifting in and out.

I'm losing myself to him.