Once in a lifetime

And it feels like a dream

The sun disappeared right before her eyes. She had handed in her piece of paper, the day flew past and she walked home slowly. She dreaded it now, being so close to him.

She looked into his eyes, cold and unmoving.
"I resigned today" she sighed looking down at her plate.
"Wae?" he seemed surprised.
"There isn't much of a reason for me to stay anymore, to keep me from bothering you" and she knew she had. She was mourning too, she needed to not be reminded of how little he cared for her. That as she had grown to love him, he still didn't love her though but she knew he loved Deiji.

He kept silent and continued to eat as she got up to leave. She wasn't eating much lately, he was worried about it. She was still vibrant, she hid things well at work but at home she was a shell of herself.

He sat in his studio, looking through the photos of them shopping, spending time together. Deiji has bought them together and now he didn't know how to get her to stay.
"Make a wish" he held up a dandelion for her to blow as she giggled. Her laugh that thrilled him even in an old video.

"Amara... I heard you are leaving" Hoseok and Namjoon were her closest friends.
"Yeah it's time" she smiled through her pain.
"Do you love him?" she flinched at their question.
"As time passes by its hard to be next to him" she didnt answer the question. "Deiji held us together but that isn't love" as they looked at each other.
"Does Yoongi know?" Jin looked at her.
"I will tell him tonight" as the weeks had passed, she felt so alone. They barely spoke.

Her days were still filled with laughter, it was when she was alone that her pain enclosed her in. Losing her daughter was enough but now losing Yoongi was more than she could bare, the memories that flooded her and threatened to push her over the edge.

Seeing him everyday, at night he spent hours in his studio. He still kept the door open and she could hear him, it helped her sleep and it would often make her feel better. Some where along the line and as time went, they had closed the gap that was between them.

The beginning wasn't awkward but there was distance, they had both slept in the same bed but there was a gap in the middle. They spoke like they did at work but at some point it had changed, to all the little things that got to her.

How his brown eyes stared deep into her, that when he laughed his cheeks puffed and his eyes would almost disappear. At some point she had started to notice. At some point he had started to bring her drinks and leave his studio more to check up on her. Somewhere in there she had learnt that she cared for him, much more than he did for her.

**

"In the end I want to be standing at the beginning with you" she watched him as the days went. His unease that didn't ease setting a date, that didn't falter when she agreed to give Deiji a sibling.

She knew him well and read him easily enough, he looked at her stopped at a traffic light.
"You would do that all again?" he had remembered what Hoseok had said.
"Deiji wasn't the reason I loved you" she smiled at him, she didn't hide much from him when he asked.
"How much it.." he trailed off. The pain flooding back to him.
"I didn't know how much you loved me.. without it I may never have known" she leaned into him landing a peck on his cheek.
"Every part of me will never go back, you better know I'm all yours" she giggled, it had surprised him her random statement as she held his hand in the car.

The way she read him like a book at times how she knew what to say and just when to say it.

"You check it" she would be thrilled either way. He looked at everyone gathered around them as they eyed him. They had edged closer as Amara's voice got quieter once they got the message from the clinic.