My Dear Melancholy (Daveed Diggs x reader)

Acceptance

you laid on your back, daveed was marking beside you. he had gone back to work but you were slowing coming back to your job.

it was hard but you could feel yourself getting better, daveed helped.

he would take his time with you, making sure you were getting up and eating again. you had put back on some of the weight but you were still not like before, so many things weren't like before.

you were taking clyde to a park, he loved the other dogs and you stayed your distance.

summer break was about to start, daveed was exited.

your phone rang and daveed looked over, you nodded and left the room.

"hello?" you leaned against the island.

"finally got a hold of you," it was your boss, shit.

"yep, it's me." you try to lighten the call.

"well, i haven't heard from you in a while... in fact everyone hasn't heard from you," they huffed.

"i know, i just- i'm sorry, a lot had been going on but i'm getting better these days, so sorry." you look over your shoulder to see daveed leaning against the door frame, arms crossed. wasn't mad, just concerned.

"well, i hate to do this but... we have to let you go," your boss sounded sad, "you're one of the best at the office but, you've been lacking and we need a leader, you're not it."

"what?" you lean forward, "but i'm better now, i-i could go into the office, i can do anything!" you plead.

"i'm sorry, this is just how it's goes."

"i can't believe this, you even said i was the best!" you slammed the palm of your hand on the counter.

"it's just the work force, i'm sorry." they sighed, "you took all your stuff at the beginning of all this... so... this is it." they said, "it's been great to have you work for me."

you stand up straight and pinch the bridge of your nose, "i would have wanted to keep working for you, sorry about all this." you cover your face altering hanging up and let your phone drop to the floor.

"(y/n)?" daveed slowly approaches.

"so, i just got fired." you look up at him, ripping the bandaid off, "i've lost almost everything." you cover you face and when you take them away daveed is right there.

he smirked, "you haven't lost me,"

"that's why i said almost." you look down.

the clock counts down and everyone is holding their breath, this is it. the final play is called and the players seem to move in slow motion, people juke and deek players out. the ball is thrown and people stand, the spiral is perfect. for a second you think that receiver isn't going to catch it, you think they'll miss and the other team will win.

but they catch it, the receiver stumbles back into the end zone and there is a split second not even a camera can register where people freeze is disbelief, but the win comes crashing down. you can feel the victory even though you've been in the stands the whole time.

the coach rushes the field in awe of their players, a couple players run to the bench. when the coach least expects it, that perfect blue gatorade is dumped on them, most of the time it misses but they got it on target. the blue liquid is going to stain but it doesn't matter because they were dumped with victory, happiness, the future.

as if you you had been dumped with a tub a gatorade, but it was guilt, pain, the past.

you felt your face tighten and your body crumble forward. you reached out to grab hold of daveed and he took your arms, you didn't look up at him.

you felt your face start to get wet as everything piled up, you had been blocking out the act of crying for so long it felt like bricks were being dropped on you while simultaneously being taken off.

"shh, there you go." daveed gently lowered you to the ground.

"i-i-" you gasped for any type of air, "m-my dad is... dead!" you scream in terror, the word had only been a word but now you realized it was a state of being.

daveed let you cry, he just let you let it all out. his presence was comforting and the little things he did made it easier.

he rubbed your back and would switch and hold your head when you would push further. his hands and arms were like a weighted blanket.

he would kiss your hair as well, little peppering at some points and long kisses at other times. they sent tingles down your spine.

the soft words, 'i got you' was the one he repeated, 'i know this is hard' was one he would say after you attempted to speak.

"i'm just gonna move us to the couch, more comfy." he whispered and picked you up, you were at daveed's house so soccer noticed and made his way over.

you curled up and the tears began to subside, it felt nice to finally let go. you had been telling yourself that none of this was real and that you were better then giving in, you didn't realize you had to let go in order to move on.

soccer jumped on the couch and started poking his snout to try and see your face, his paw was tapping your side and he was whining to see you.

"soccer, off." daveed commanded. soccer let out a cry and tried to see your face again, he dug his snout in and moved it around to get you to sit up. "soccer." daveed tried to push him off, "bad. dog." daveed rolled over to put himself between the two of you hit soccer just jumped over you and daveed and started poking at your back.

you look up and shake your head a bit to get the hair out of your face, you look over you shoulder and soccer immediately starts to kick your face, daveed scoffs and tried to push him off again.

"i feel, lighter." you lean back into daveed, "it's gonna hurt for a while but... i feel at peace." you look up and daveed kissed your forehead.

"i'm glad, sorry about the firing." he rubbed your arm.

you sigh and look at soccer, "i don't know what to do."

"i mean, i don't know many people but, i've got some friends from collage." daveed shrugged.

"we'll figure it out," you pull soccer in for a kiss.

"i mean... you..." daveed looks off to the side, "you could sell or i could sell or we both could sell and move in together."