the rumor || 2kim

my way to express my feelings

[CHAEWON POV]

We stopped hugging and we're staring at each other without talking.

After a while, I decided to take some words.

"Is there a way I can help you?" I asked

"I don't really know... I am scared of going back... to my home. Where my mother and my ignorant brother are waiting.." she told me.

She looks so upset...

How can Minsoo be a brother. He doesn't help his own little sister. I'm disgusted that he's my boyfriend but I need him to get clean from those rumours...

And I will never forgive her mother for harming Minjoos beautiful face..

"You know what? What about sleeping at my house for tonight?" I asked her without thinking of to ask my family

"What about your family??" She asked

"Well they'll be okay with that I guess. My sister would be happy that I finally found someone to spend time with. My mother is busy today with work and my cousin is very nice. She sleeps at our house because her parents had moved to another city but she didn't want to leave her hometown so she lives with us. Her name is Choi Yena!" I said

Minjoos face looks like she's thinking about it. I hope she won't treat me differently when she sees in what kind of family I live...

"F-fine. If it's really okay I'll stay at your house." She answered

I want to show my happiness with a smile but I can't. It's so hard...

I grabbed her hand instead.

"K-Kim Chaewon?? Could you explain what you're doing??" She said with a nervous expression

While looking at her hand which I'm holding, I answer: "that's my way to show my happiness. It's still hard to show my emotions. When I start showing emotions, a voice in my mind tells me to stop and tells me that I don't deserve that with throwing comments at me which make me feel the worst... but back then at your house... this voice disappeared. I was able to cry, to be angry and to smile... I'm so thankful. I finally know what freedom feels like.."

I... really want to show my happiness... I want to be free again... I want to be happy... for her... for minjoo...

No. I want something different

I don't want to be happy for Minjoo...

I want to be happy with her.

Smile with her.

Laugh with her.

I want to show it to her so bad.

But...

Do I deserve that?

"You deserve to be the happiest"

Huh?? What was that??

"Kim Chaewon, look at my eyes."

I look up to Minjoo and look at her eyes

"Chaewon, whatever this voice is telling you, you still deserve to be the happiest." Minjoo said...

"It's also hard for me to show what I feel but I found a way to express my feelings. I write letters about how I feel. That really helps me. You can also find your own way of expressing your feelings. I can help you" Minjoo said

Again... she becomes my key again. She always helps me..

I want to do the same for her.

I want to be her key.

"I found my way to express my feelings already..." I said

"What? What is it?" She asked surprisingly

"You're my way to express my feelings."

[TO BE CONTINUED]