the rumor || 2kim

soft hands

[MINJOO POV]

She really doesn't give an answer...

I'm looking at her hands and noticed something. They're small and cute! She's still hiding her face... I decided to touch the wall of hands...

...her hands are so soft.

I took my hands back

"You're getting shy when someone grabs your arm but you haven't showed a reaction like this when you were kissing my brother... that's weird. Are you asexual?" I asked. She removed her hands and gives an nervous energy off. She looks seriously to my direction. She is very tense.... after a while. She opens her mouth.

"N-no, I'm not. Just forget that I blushed. And yeah, let's act like we're ok." She said with turning empty again. That part of her personality is concerning. Whenever I had seen her at school, she was so empty... I really want to know how she looks like when she smiles.

I collected courage to ask her "why are you always that empty?"

The scandalous girl moved her eyes to the left.

"Because I feel nothing... no matter when, I feel nothing. Since I have lost my best friend because I trusted her... I can feel nothing." She said. "One reason more why I want a relationship with your brother. I finally want to feel something. I wanna feel love"

I opened my mouth a bit without saying anything. After one minute, I decided to take a word. "You want to feel love? I think you mean that you want to be loved. And you feel nothing? It's more like you don't want to feel anything.."

She came closer to me with an angry face. She shouts "I said I feel nothing! I can't feel... and what do I get from being loved?! Nothing... I want to love."

"See, you got angry. You feel something. But it's not anger. It's something different..." I told her what made her to grab my shoulders with two of her hands. "THEN TELL ME WHAT I FEEL!"

I looked at her with a pitying face

"You're sad. You're frustrated. The frustration makes you angry. You don't want to feel something because you felt pain. The sadness and fear in you made you avoiding feelings and you hide your sadness with emptiness. You can't escape from the emptiness anymore and now you want to feel love. But you can't love someone because you want to. It happens out of nowhere..." I explained

She took few steps to the back with letting my shoulders go.

All of sudden, tears are flowing out of her eyes. The emptiness left her body and she can finally show her emotions.

I said to her with a worried face "it's ok to cry! You're strong..."

Her rumors are so unbelievable now... she seems to be so hurt... she seems like the victim...

Should I stop pitying? I don't know... what is her secret that made her old friend to treat her like a bully even she isn't one?! I really start to believe her...

She turned her back to me and continues with crying.

I don't know what to do in this kind of situation... I don't have real life friends I don't have any experiences about comforting people in real life. In addition, I was always the one who need to be comforted because of the lack of confidence I have-

One of my online friends told me that a hug makes people feeling better...

I AM TOO SHY FOR THIS but I need to comfort her!

I am getting closer to her body and I slowly open my arms.

We didn't end up with  a hug.

Before I was able to hug her from the back, my brother quickly entered the room. I stopped getting closer to her and he saw Chaewon crying...

[To be continued]