Geric - The Golden Edna

Lets Goooooooo

Purple strobe lights illuminated the sewers around them, streaming from the top of the sails where Edna was operating them. Smoke fizzled from the deck of the ship as Horseman vaped. The trapdoor disappeared inwards as a platform rose, hidden in the darkness. The purple lights started to converge on the figure. Black shoes. Black socks. Black kilt. The lights lurched upwards, revealing the hunky figure of Inspector Mister Goole.

Eric looked over to where the other Inspector Mister Goole was standing, only to find that he was missing. He looked back over to the boat.

"What the fuck." Inspector Mister Goole announced.

"Single man, tell us a bit about yourself!" Eric said, strolling back to the ship.

"I love this part!" IMG squealed, jumping in giddiness before regaining his composure. "Ah. I am an Inspector. I am a fan of Socialism, self-insert fics, and being a part of bullshit English tests where the author should definitely get more marks than a certain someone but a certain teacher is rigged."

Neither Edna, Horseman or Eric turned off their lights.

"Looks like you've passed the first round with flying colours, Inspector Mister Goole!" Eric said as Inspector Mister Goole fist-pumped the air. "Now you've got to turn off a light. Remember, no likey, no lighty."

The audience whooped and hollered in excitement as Inspector Mister Goole ran towards the three. His eyebrows furrowed, his hand hovered over Edna's button. He pushed downwards, until suddenly swapping over to Horseman's buzzer and turning his light off.

"Tough luck, Horseman! Talk me through it, Inspector Mister Goole. Why Horseman?"

"I am still recovering from my last relationship with an aquatic creature. I am sad."

"Don't tell us everything about you, because you've made it through to Round Two! We've got an old friend of yours to tell us a little bit about you. Now, take it away!"

Eva lay on the table, motionless.

A minute passed.

"A brilliant profile from your friend, there! I loved the part with the silence! So I'm keeping my lighty on, because I likey!" Eric winked.

"I am so happy right now. I am almost... ecstatic."

"Brave words from an Inspector who needs to turn a light off and pick their date!"

Inspector Mister Goole ran towards Edna and Eric, sweat dripping down his forehead, his tail wagging excitedly behind him. "I am so stressed right now."

His hand darted between the two buttons, slowly going lower. Eric gulped, wondering whether this was the end for him. Inspector Mister Goole looked upwards, locking eyes with Eric as he took Eric's hands in his own. Slowly, he placed them on Eric's own buzzer, a frown on his face.

"It's okay, I understand." Eric said solemnly, tears forming in his eyes.

Inspector Mister Goole pushed downwards, plunging Eric into darkness until the celebratory purple strobe lights activated. The sewer illuminated with joy as Inspector Mister Goole grabbed Edna in a hug, picking her up and spinning on the spot. "Edna, you were my first choice!"

She squirmed in happiness, reaching an inside frequency of super high.

"Well, well, well! Single man no more, Inspector Mister Goole, because you and your lucky date are off to the Isle of Fernando's!"

The audience erupted with cheers and applause as the new couple walked up the sewer stairs, holding hands. They stopped at the end, turned back to the boat and waved enthusiastically. Horseman and Eric returned the sentiment, bittersweet grins on their faces as the duo moved out of sight, fingers interlocked.

"Do you ever think we'll see them again, my brobot?" Horseman asked, a wistful tone in their chitter.

"I'm sure we will. One day. When we need them most. Those two are cuter than Stockholm and Bristol's relationship."