Letters & Leather | The Outsiders

~Chapter 13~

Dallas Winston didn't know what part he played in this novel. In fact he didn't know what part he played in his life. He felt as if his whole life had already been predetermined, as if a director had grabbed him from birth, scripting his life to be some violent, hoodlum dropout with no control over his life. Most people wouldn't suspect this about Dallas though. Most people would assume he had chosen this life because he simply couldn't care less about the outcomes. People viewed Dally solely as incautious and impetuous. He didn't blame people for viewing him as this, how could he blame them for judging him when he gives them all the reasons to judge him? This was the conundrum. Deep down, somewhere in the hollow shaft of his heart, he did care. He did care about his life and what he's made out of it - he did want an escape. Maybe it was Dallas Winston himself who labelled himself as impetuous.

No one knew these uncommunicative thoughts that loomed the back of his mind and no one would ever know. He was born alone, he would die alone. That's just how it was for greasers like Dally. There was one thing set in stone for Dallas, however, and that was that no one would ever catch him complaining about this life. He would not let anyone even possibly think he was sensitive or that he cared.

That was until tonight.

"God Johnny, how did this happen? How did this happen? How did this happen?" His voice was coarse, arms locked around Audrey's limp body as they scampered down the barren streets, trying to get to his car. His muscled arms tensed from under Audrey's cold body, darkened eyes covered with a sheet of his messy bangs.

Johnny didn't answer, of course, he was in a state of total disturbance - he was shell shocked. Dally kept a close side-eye onto him, just one look of Johnny reminded him quickly of the first time he ever saw a dead body, back in New York. He was around eleven or twelve at the time, he remembered seeing the thick blanket of blood covering the blank, motionless body. This was the time that Dallas had realised the world does not revolve purely around him. Everyone had their own, if not more, complex life with their own individual thoughts and that same life could be stolen quickly away from them in a blink. This shifted something in that prepubescent boy, he knew if he ever found a home, a family, he would look after them to make sure that their intricate thoughts could never be taken away from them like that body he saw on the streets.

Dally had found a home, a family. He had found the gang and he had found Johnny. He saw himself in that damaged boy, and he had swore to himself he would never let Johnny's life turn into his. He would do anything.

Taking his large palm and placing it roughly on Johnny's jeaned shoulder, he shook him. "It's gonna be okay, Johnny. She's gonna be okay."

Once they had reached Darry's drive and located Dally's car, he quickly placed Audrey's body across the back seats. Two-Bit helped with this, grabbing her body and setting her head to rest gently onto his lap. Two-Bit gently stroked her skin, placing a strand of wet hair away from her face. His features were the opposite of nonchalant, the opposite of what Two-Bit normally was.

The yellowish lights of the Curtis brother's house came on, then the sound of the latch on the front door. Sodapop, Steve and Ponyboy came rushing out - Ponyboy still looked battered, but he couldn't let his body be consumed by sleep knowing his best friend and Audrey were still out there. The three ran out, standing across from Dally's car, pupils wide searching for answers.

Ponyboy spotted Johnny, his heart repusicating with relief. "Johnnycakes!" his voice squeaked a little from the volume he spoke at, limping over as fast as he could towards his friend. He wrapped his arms around his shoulders, feeling Johnny's stiff body from under his arms. "Johnny? ..." Ponyboy released himself from the hug, placing his arms on both of Johnny's shoulders. His eyes flickered to each of Johnny's trying to communicate with him.