Kairos

Almost youth

Quite often I do find

the little girl next door with the not so little boy from across town

He holds her without any holy room

 

She compares their closeness to what she’s explained to me as an “almost”

An almost, the girl says, is the most painful part of being alive

You wait around waiting

waiting for some piece of life to shutter by

She said

waiting provokes waiting

hand constantly holding your head

 

At her explanation

I called my husband, my dear

the man i had been given to, the man who does not hold me near

He explained exclaimed she was silly, too young to understand

that fate is not determined, fate had been written before and by her old man

 

She seemed to scoot away at this

her sour, puckered face

as i stumbled to the door

she reached out

hands close to my waist

 

agasp i yell

agasp he scream

agasp the girl

what was her reason to touch me

what are her means

 

this time she stumbled

this time she cracked

this time she said

almost is something you can never take back

 

leaving the yard

her shoes in hand and petunia seeds put to rest

the little girl from next door hugs him tightly once more

 

i recall this duller feeling

like falling while staying still

 

almost wanted by this man

almost wrapped into a swoon

almost heard forever

almost fell for you