the world should know you're mine- stefanielle

twenty six

two weeks later

danielle

stefanía leaves for italy today. i'm really going to miss her, this will be the longest we've ever spent apart since we met. i don't know how i'll handle it. with the different time zones and her not being at home or at work. she is taking jeff with her, so i don't even have her. i have some of her clothes and a little bear she got me the other day for have when she leaves. it smells like her and i love it. "i think i finally finished packing." she says and i look down from her bed.

"did you bring a couple of my shirts?" i ask her and she smiles.

"si, of course bambina." she closes her big suitcase and zips it up. i watch her as she walks into the bathroom. i hold the bear she got me tight and try not to think about the fact that my girlfriend is going to italy without me for who knows how long. clearly, i've failed. "bambina. it will be okay." stefania says as she sits down next to me. she places her hand on the side of my face and i lean into it. i set the bear down next to me and melt into her arms. "we can facetime, and it will go fast." she holds me in her arms and kisses my head. i feel tears building up again, i don't want to say goodbye. i lift my head up to look at my beautiful girlfriend.

"i love you." i manage to slip out as tears begins to fall from my eyes.

"bambina, oh i love you so much." she says and i can tell she's trying not to cry. she wipes some of my tears and places a kiss on my lips. "i have to call my mama and tell her i'm leaving soon." she says. i nod and grab the bear again as she leaves the room. who knew i could ever be this soft? i didn't even know i could.

j- how are you feeling? want me to come over after she leaves? will you be ok?
d- maybe, but you've never seen me this way
j- that's because you've never been this way! she's changed you
d- crazy crazy, i know. if other people found out i would be dead
j- hahaha true. let me know if you want me to come over!
d- i will, she's talking to her mama right now.

i set my phone down and slip off the bed. the floor is cold and i'm only wearing stefanias t-shirt. when i walk into the kitchen stefanía is saying goodbye to her mama. she sets the phone down and looks at me. "bambina, go get dressed so you can drive home." she looks stressed. i walk closer to her and pull her into a kiss. i push her against the counter as our kisses become more rough. "danielle." she says. we kiss for a while more before she finally breaks it off. "i have to go."

"i know." i say feeling my face drop. she holds my face in her hand and kisses my forehead.

"come on." she holds my hand and we walk back into her room. i put on a pair of sweatpants and grab the bear as stefania gets her things. we decided on not driving to the airport together because we would never actually say goodbye. we walk out to the fromt room and there's a few minutes before stefanía has to go. she pulls me into a big hug and i squeeze her tight. we stand there for a few minutes just holding each other.

"i'm gonna miss you." i tell her.

"i'm gonna miss you too bella." she pulls away and smiles at me. "you're beautiful." she checks the time in her phone and sighs. "i have to go now bellina. come on so i can lock up."

"i don't want to leave." i say.

"well, you can stay here if you really want." she suggests. i shake my head.