tony: after a thorough medical assessment, the doctors have diagnosed me with "a lot. just a lot to deal with"
pepper: you can't just keep taking in every child with parental issues
tony: not with that attitude, i can't
baby goat: *bleats at bucky*
t'challa: DON'T YOU YELL AT YOUR MOTHER!
bucky: describe yourself in one word
t'challa, taking his hand: yours!
bucky: tHAT'S DISGUSTING
bucky: ... say it again
bucky: why are you wearing nikes lol
shuri: why are you dressed like a gay sugar baby
bucky:
bucky: okay
peter, a gen z kid, after screwing up: fuck. guess i'll kill myself
steve, an artist in the 30s who knows all about dadaism and fatalistic humor: there's a rope in the supply closet
bucky, who had to listen to steve's art rants and went through 70+ years of shit: and some bleach under the sink, if you want options
the rest of the avengers, (relatively) normal people: ??????????
steve: *tries and fails to get back into tony's good graces for the six billionth time*
bucky: great! you tried. you failed. now, let's go to sleep!
rhodey: look, it's simple. all you have to say is, "hello! i took a blood test and i want my results back."
tony, letting the phone ring: *nods*
nurse: hello, can i help you?
tony:
tony: I WANT MY BLOOD BACK
tony: *hangs up*
