Dwelling Back (Cradles Of The Past Series 1)

37

Uwi

"Dad, why didn't you tell me?" I called him directly when I got to my room after my talk with Tanner. Good thing it's morning there.

"He refused my offer, honey. Don't stress about it." He replied while sipping his coffee na parang wala lang. "Dad, alam mo na he'll refuse it talaga dahil alam nyang ayaw kong umuwi. Even if I tell him to go, he won't. And you know na I can't say no to Tanner." I replied truthfully.

"Dad, ayaw ko nga umuwi." I told him once again. "Anak naman, gusto ko ng makita palagi ang apo ko. And I need help with our businesses anak. I'm not getting any younger!" He replied and my heart softened at what he said.

"So, palagi ka nalang mag tatago? Yan ba ang naka move on? Maawa ka naman sa daddy mo gurl. Sya lang mag isa nag hahandle ng napakarami nyong negosyo." Irene's words echoed on my mind.

Am I being to selfish?

Hindi. Natatakot lang talaga ako.

But I can't live in fear forever.

This is the least I can do for Tanner.

I sighed defeated. Siguro nga oras na. This is for Tanner and daddy. Tsaka I really want Theo to spend more time with daddy.

Tsaka may negosyo pang kailangan ko ng atupagin.

"Sige dad. Tanner will be the head engineer and sige na. Oo na, uuwi na kami. I'll talk to Tanner about this in the morning. But please don't expect na agad agad to dahil marami pa Kaming aasikasohin." I said and I saw the relief in daddy's eyes.

You won, dad. Uuwi na ako.

I checked on Theo and decided to bring him to my room para makatabi ko sa pag tulog.

I think it's time na rin for me to go home.

The next morning I woke up with Theo sitting on my face. Jusko tong anak ko na to.
"Good morning, handsome" I told him as I slowly grabbed him to sit on the bed and not on my face. He smiled at me and said some gibberish words. He's so cute. I kissed his cheeks and cuddled my son while breastfeeding na rin. 

Theo can speak now and understand his surroundings but he's just a toddler and he's still learning some other words. 

and he looks just like his father.

Everytime I look at my son my heart aches because I can clearly see him. Somehow I am thankful to him because he gave me my Theo.

Yeah, I guess it's really time for me to go home. In order for me to fully let go of everything.

"Breakfast is ready!" Tanner said breaking my thoughts as he entered my room smiling at us. He noticed that I was feeding Theo so he looked away and handed me a  scarf for me to cover up while Theo is drinking but Theo pulled away immediately when he sensed Tanner kaya nag ayos ako agad. 

Sanay na rin kami ni Tanner sa isa't isa but don't get me wrong he's never seen me naked. He respects me so much though nandyan sya minsan pag nagpapainom ako kay Theo to assist in case I need something but of course naka tago naman yung dede ko ng scarf noh. 

"Dada! Dada!" Theo said when he saw Tanner and I smiled. Theo really loves Tanner so much. "Hey big boy!" Tanner said getting Theo and gave him kisses on his stomach that tickled him and made him laugh so much.

I couldn't help it but smile while looking at them. Ganito din kaya sana sila?

Ay nako! Gising na George! Mukhang tulog ka pa.

"Babe, come on. Irene's there already. Let's eat." He said and pulled me up while carrying Theo in his other hand.

Mind you, Tanner is shirtless right now and damn those abs still amazes me every time.

He pulled me closer to him hugging me and Theo and showered us with kisses. I couldn't help it but laugh. "Tanner stop!" I said laughing while supporting Theo's back to make sure he does not fall.

"Ay! Sorry!" I heard Irene yell when she came into the room and saw us. I pulled away and Tanner let me be still carrying Theo. "Isturbo bah?" Irene joked and winked at me.

Gaga talaga.

"Medyo.." Tanner replied jokingly and Irene just rolled her eyes at us and laughed. "Come on guys. Let's not keep the food waiting." Tanner said about to go out.

"Uh, Irene can you take Theo first. Mauna na kayo sa dining. Kakausapin ko lang si Tanner." I said and took Theo's teddy bear and handed it to irene para sumama si Theo. Irene gave me the "What's this about look" but I ignored her and she understood and took Theo and left me and Tanner.

"Something wrong?" Tanner said now facing me. I smiled at him and motioned my head no. "I thought about it last night." I replied and his eyes narrowed not understanding what I was saying.

"I don't want to be selfish. I want you to be happy. I know you want it, you know the job that dad offered you. I want you to take it." I added taking his hand and caressed it softly while giving him a small smile.

"George, it's fine. You don't have to worry about it. I don't want to force you." He replied and I knew he'd say this. "No, no one's forcing me. I thought about it last night and I think tama rin si dad. He really wants me to go home. Besides, I want to do this for you. I know this will make you happy." I replied and cupped his face smiling and he was just staring at me.

"We're going to the Philippines. You're gonna build that building, I'll start helping dad with our business and Theo gets to spend more time with his grandpa. I think it's a win win situation for the three of us." I added and he was still speechless. Our faces are so close I could feel his breath.

"George, this means so much to me. Thank you." Tanner said bending over to me and rested his forehead on mine. I relaxed and tried to make everything sink in.

Uuwi na talaga ako. Wala ng bawian to.

"I love you.." Tanner whispered softly and before I could say anything his lips crashed on mine.

Our lips touched and moved in sync. Hinayaan ko ang sariling kong ramdamin ang halik ni Tanner.

When we pulled away he hugged me tight and I hugged back.

"Ma una ka na sa kitchen. I'll just arrange the bed first then I'll follow you." I said and smiled at him and he nodded before heading out.

I sat on the bed and a tear fell. My heart is aching again.

When we kissed, I didn't feel it.

Napaiyak nalang ako. Hindi ko naramdaman ang nararamdaman ko tuwing hinahalikan ako ni Tristan nuon.

Ang sakit. Nasasaktan ako dahil gusto kong si Tanner nalang.

Ayaw kong masaktan si Tanner. Gusto kong sya. nalang.

Pero hindi natuturuan ang puso.