i love you. (eddie x juicy)

cuts. (pt. 6)

hello my angels! so for this chapter, it's only going to be eddie's POV.

sorry if i'm cringe 🤠

TW! cutting

Eddie's POV

Gaege. Mully. Josh. Grant. If it were only that easy. If only I was fucking happy again. But no. It's not that I still care for her, I don't. I've been hiding something from you guys. And I'm sorry.

"Eddie?" A faint voice said.

"Babe." Gaege said.

"Oh yeah, sorry." I said. "You feeling ok?" Gaege whispered. I gave him a small nod. He started rubbing my back, giving a faint smile. "I'm gonna use the bathroom real quick." I said. The restrooms weren't in the rooms, like they usually would be. So I hope I wouldn't look to suspicious walking into the room. I looked into my bag for my small knife. I found it, and grabbed that shit. Before I walked out, the door opened. Gaege walked in. "Hey, babe. What are you doing?" He asked, shutting the door. "Nothing..?" I said, extending the 'o'. My hands were behind my back - Hoping he wouldn't look. "Mhm, sure. What's behind you're back?" Gaege asked. I couldn't come up with any excuses, so I lowered my hands. Showing the knife. "Is that a knife? Eddie, are you serious?"

"You don't need me anyways. What's the point."

"Of course I fucking need you! Are you seriously going to end you're life like this?"

"Gaege, I love you! Okay? I fucking love you. It hurts knowing I'm hurting all of you. Just hold me, Gaege."

Gaege held me close to him.

"Babe, you shouldn't be doing this. I promise, it gets better. Please baby." Gaege whispered. Tears were rolling down my face. I gripped the back of his sweater. "It's so hard. It's so fucking hard." I said

"What's so hard babe?"

We released ourselves from the hug. I stared into his eyes, leaning closer to his face. Gaege put his hands on my cheeks, pulling my face, and connecting our lips together. I moaned into the kiss, my hands on his waist. Our tongues swirling.

"Mmm" Gaege moaned. We broke the kiss, pants, and small whimpers escaped our mouths. "Was that so hard?" He asked. I giggled. "Babe, what's really happening? Why are you still feeling like this?" Asked Gaege. "I'll tell you, after I use the restroom." I said. The knife was still in my pocket. I opened the bathroom door, rolling up my sleeves. I hate being like this. Grabbing the knife, and slowly cut my wrist. I'm still young, and mature to be feeling this way. I should be happy. The door nob turned. Fuck. "Oop! Sorry- Eddie?" Mul said. "Hey bud, what are you doing?" He asked, looking at the blood spots on the floor, including my wrist. I patted the floor, signaling for him to sit down. "Hi, Mully." I said. Mully smiled. "I'm sorry, Eddie. Please, talk to me. I don't want to lose my best friend." Mully said. "It helps. A lot. I don't want to be here with my friends, being so sad. I hate feeling like i'm so trapped. I'm so mature, Mully. And It's hard to deal with this. Gaege, he's my boyfriend. But he's also my best fucking friend. I hate letting him down." I said, bursting into tears. Mully rubbed my back. "I know. It's ok." Mully whispered. "I'm trying so hard to be happy - I need help. I really do." I exclaimed. "Here mate." Mul said, handing me bandages. I wrapped it around my arm, grunting in pain. "Feel better. We'll be in the living room." Said Mully.

I walked out, my sleeves going past my hands. I opened the door of my room, seeing Gaege on the bed. I crawled on top of him, dry humping him twice. "You really are the top baby." He said, kissing me. "Hi gorgeous." I whispered.

"I used to cut myself too."

"I'm sorry baby."

"You shouldn't be."

I looked at both of his empty hands. I decided to hold both of them, my body on top of his.

"Why don't we do that when we fuck 🌝?"

"Ew. I love you, pendejo."

"I love you more, bubba."

I got off of him. Sitting up on the bed. "Babe. Please, don't get mad." I said. I lifted my sleeves up, and looked away. Tears forming in my eyes. "Baby, look at me. I'm not mad at you. It's OK. Just, please, try not doing it again." He replied. I looked at him. His hair in front of his eyes. I tried so hard not crying.

But I couldn't hold it in.

"I'm so sorry baby! I'm such a disappointment." I exclaimed.

"A disappointment? No! Never babe. It's alright. Cutting is normal for people."

"But I was so happy. I don't know why that changed."

Gaege lifted his hand, and placed it on my cheek. "Because you needed to feel this way. Even if you wanted to or not." Gaege whispered. (i'm sorry that i put whispered much "-")

"People always feel this way, Eddie." Grant said.

"You weren't, and you still aren't the only one feeling this." Josh said.

"We have your back, mate. We love you as well." Mully said.

They all walked over, giving the biggest hugs.

I love you guys so much.

I promise I won't cut anymore..