Moon

Chapter 4

The reflection in the mirror was of me, and yet it was not. My red hair tucked behind my ears seemed dry and lifeless. My green eyes seemed to become more and duller each day. My skin no longer had a beautiful paleness to it but an almost sickly pale instead. I was losing myself.

The tight black corset, black knee length pencil skirt and 4 inch black stilettos made me cringe. Nothing was wrong with the items of clothing, it just wasn't...me. I was losing myself... all on behalf of my future mate.

I let out a frustrated scream, tore the clothes off of me and then ripped them up for good measure. I would not change; I couldn't bare to do it.

"Hey, can I come in?" A beautiful girl said poking her head in my door. I nodded my head yes. In human years, Virgo is 27, and she has been reborn for 17 years. She's the one I am closest to out of everyone in the coven besides Ember and Julian. Virgo was like another big sister to me. We bonded over everything and she was the one I would talk to about my difficulties of being a vampire if Julian wasn't around, Virgo gave the best advice.

She walked to me, her long brown curly hair bouncing with every step she took. She looked at my face and instantly knew something wasn't right. "What's wrong?" I inhaled and held my breath for a moment. "Ember has Kalen as my consort, we will be mates in less than two weeks," I told Virgo as I changed into my own clothes. "Kalen?! That's a totally imperfect match, that's like making you a slave, why am I just to hear of this?" she said. I shrugged my shoulders. "You know Ember wouldn't let you do anything you don't want to do, your her pride and joy Moon, her only real family left," Virgo smiled.

"She is utterly serious about this situation, the elders are coming. She figures I need someone strong beside me," I said. Virgo stayed silent knowing that my fate had been decided if the elders were involved. They were like the law, the ancients. We had government in our own covens but the Elders governed all.

"Was it this way for you and Tristan?" I asked about her and her own mate. Tristan and Virgo have been together since I was reborn. Even though we are supposed to be hollow, they always looked happy together. I guess love, is the only thing that can't be broken, erased... and the only thing every living organism can't escape And I wanted that. I didn't want to be forced to belong to someone.

"No, Tristan was actually in another coven located in Paris. Our coven had been staying there for a year. I saw him and felt drawn to him, and the way he looked at me, I could tell he was drawn to me as well. We talked, explored together, hunted together, and I knew I wanted him always beside me. Ember saw how happy I was with him, that by the time we were to move to another location, here... she got permission for him to be released from his past coven and brought him here with us, we have been inseparable ever since," she said with a gleam in her eyes. "And that's how it will always be, forever," Tristan said, suddenly appearing in my room, and hugging Virgo.

"Well I want that, I want what you guys have, which does not include Kalen...I wish Julian was more accepting," I said. "You and Kalen?" Tristan asked with a smile, clearly amused. I rolled my eyes and I stood up, threw a pillow at him which he caught, and put on my black leather jacket. "Where are you going?" She asked. "Just to feed and back," I smiled.

*********

I was resting on the roof of my home when a shadow almost as dark as the night sky appeared. I knew it was Julian so I stayed quiet, waiting for him to come to me, a few moments later his feet were to the right of me. "I knew you'd be out here." I looked at him before lying down again, after a few seconds he joined me in the same position. "You know I will not allow you to marry kalen especially if you will not happily agree to do so." I took a deep breath. After the talk with Virgo, talking about kalen and I became almost depressing. I had no desire to spend any moment with Julian knowing our bond increased every moment we're together but we wouldn't be. The thing to do would be to push him away, and let fate take its course.

"So when do you plan to leave me again, I know very soon since my birthday has past, you will leave." He sighed. "Moon, you say that as if I belong here, or even belong to a specific coven...we both know the world is far too great for me to miss it by completing rules made by the ancients. There is so much more then this...then the night. There is life even though we don't have a beating heart; we are alive are we not?" I nodded my head yes. "So I can't suffocate myself, cage myself in from the world. I never have and never will. You have a taste for freedom just like I, perhaps yours is a bit fresher since you aren't as close to me in age." He said.

I decided to try to bargain, even though I already knew Julian would be against it. "You don't have to belong to a coven...let me come with you, it could be the three of us, us and Marlowe." I suggested. "You would leave Ember behind. The family you care so much about and those feelings are mutual? That is sad Moon." I huffed out of frustration, Julian is more than stubborn. "I'd leave to share journeys with you." I confessed. He stayed quiet.

I looked up and noticed the sky was becoming a deep purple/blue. I could smell that the sun would soon rise. I looked at Julian and saw everything in him, once again I fell for him and he had done nothing to make me do so. It's something I can't control, even without a heart. "Come on, don't want to become ashes," Julian said. He reached out his hand in which I took hold of. Then together we jumped off the roof to the inside of mansion and then went to take our places in our coffins.

For a while I stayed awake in my coffin, just staying silent in the dark. I knew Julian would leave soon so internally I questioned why it would matter to fight against what is almost meant to be. Unless Julian took me away from here...from kalen, I could no longer fight. In the after math I'd be the one standing alone and having to face my coven.