Tranquilize Me (A Mötley Crüe Story)

2.

Tommy Lee

"what do you mean?" I ask my mysterious roommate, gesturing to the window.

"I know what you were thinking." He replies in a completely monotone voice, flipping his hair out of his face

"How?"

"Nobody ever goes to that window without thinking about killing themselves." My roommate says in a tone that's dryer than an old womans titty.

"Oh..."

I look around, seeing the bathroom. I notice it's got a cut out in the top. That's slightly weird. It's probably so they can spy on us if we get put in one on one. That's when you try to kill yourself and fail, and they basically watch you non stop, 24/7. That must be uncomfortable, which is why I'm not planning on failing. I can't this time.

I push the bathroom door open and cautiously step inside. My roommate follows and I glance at him, but say nothing. the first thing I notice, is that there are anti slip guards on the floor. The second thing I notice is that the shower head is rounded and slanted. It's probably that way so we won't kill ourselves. The curtains are also held up by magnets, and everything else is slanted and rounded.

Gee they really thought of everything...

Within the next ten seconds, I hear a ding come from the ceiling. "Dinner is now ready." A mans voice says, and then disappears. They must have some kind of announcement system.

I glance at my roommate, who gives the announcement system the middle finger. He's got long, spidery fingers, delicate yet muscular arms, littered with tiny scars, and one long one. I know the small, straight ones all too well, I have them myself.

The long one intrigues me though. What happened? How did he get it? Self harm or something else? My eyes meet his, and I can feel my heart flutter a little. He doesn't seem dangerous, unlike what I've heard about mental hospital patients. He seems, guarded, although I will admit that him following me around the room is a bit strange.

His eyes flicker a brilliant green, the corners of his mouth turning up into a small smirk. This is the first time I've seen him show any emotion, and honestly, it draws me to him even more. I don't know why, I'm not exactly here to fall in love. I've been honest with my feelings for a long time, and I can definitely feel my hopeless ass getting drawn into his presence.

The last boyfriend I had always called me fat, and he cheated a lot. I don't know if I can trust Nikki. I don't even know why he's here in the first place, and he could very well be a serial murderer. I almost look away, but something makes me hold my gaze.

"Honestly, the food here isn't bad." Nikki says, taking my arm and dragging me into the hallway.

My stomach churns. The thought of food makes me want to throw up. It's such a sick thing that the thing that keeps most people alive, gives me panic attacks. I don't feel hungry enough to eat, because I just know my brain will be kicking my ass the second that I'm back in the room.

"Do we have to eat?" I ask.

"They watch you pretty closely. But if you aren't hungry, just slip some food under the table into my hand."

"Thanks." I say, giving him a relieved look.

"No problem. Love the food here. But I'd rather have something else in my mouth," Nikki smirks.

I feel my face get red. I know what he's hinting at, but the truth is, I'm a virgin. I've never had sex before. I wouldn't know how any of that works. I mean I could've looked up porn or some shit, but with a strict military dad, that would be disastrous. Especially since he goes through my search history like a raccoon goes through trash.

Maybe I'm overthinking this. Maybe Nikki wasn't even hinting at anything.

We get to the cafeteria area, and I get a good look at some of the other patients. At the table we're sitting at, there's a blonde boy. He looks, tired- I mean his face looks haunted, his dark eyes seem regretful, dark circles and eye bags rim them. He's eating, but mostly staring off in to space.

A black haired boy sits next to him. I'm guessing he's the same as me, Anorexia Nervosa. Maybe Bulimia. He's really thin, and seems more alert than the blonde.

"Mick, Vince." Nikki greets as we slide in next to them.

"Hey Sixx." Mick says.

"Sup." Vince comes to life, looking at Nikki.

"Who are you?" Mick asks me.

"Tommy." I reply, poking at my hamburger.

"Tommy?" Vince asks, taking a small bite of food.

"Si."

"Well, this is Mick. He's here because he has Ankylosing Spondylitis and he tried to jump off a bridge after his diagnosis. And Vince got wasted and got into a car accident with his best friend and his little sister Skylar in the car and killed them both. He says he hears their ghosts so they locked him up like a nutjob." Nikki explains.

"FUCK YOU SIXX!" Vince screeches. "WHY DON'T YOU TELL HIM THAT YOU'RE A DEPRESSED WANNABE ROCKSTAR WHO CUT HIMSELF WITH A FUCKING KNIFE ALL THE WAY DOWN HIS ARM AND CAN'T CONTROL HIS ANGER?! WHY DON'T YOU TELL HIM THAT YOU'RE THE PSYCHOPATH!"

"You fucking bastard, I'll-" Nikki cuts himself off and lunges at Vince.

Two nurses get here before he can actually hurt Vince. Nikki gets dragged off of Vince, kicking and thrashing. He manages to knock both of our food trays on to the floor. Along with the stupid, useless sporks. Thank god dinner is forgotten tonight. I line up along a wall with Mick and Vince.

"So...how old are you two?" I ask, trying not to watch Nikki get restrained and tranquilized.

"16." Vince replies, wiping some of his blood off of his face with his sleeve.

"Same." I reply.

"I'm 17. Nikki is Sixxteen."  Mick mumbles.

"Old man." I grin, nudging him.

"Fuck off." Mick replies.

We head out of the cafeteria, and Mick and Vince say that they want to show me around. Honestly, I'm beat, but I agree to it, and they lead me to a room that they call the common area.

It's yellow, trying to seem sunny. One young kid is there, his therapist beside him in a chair as she reads a book to him. There's a wall full of books, none of which look very appealing. There's a bunch of chairs and a couple of batteries are scattered on the floor. Crayons and paper decorate tables. A TV is also in here. Bolted into the wall and surrounded by plexiglass to keep anybody from tearing it off the wall.

Soon enough, I manage to escape back to my room, the feeling of insomnia already hitting even though I'm exhausted. Nikki's back, laying on his bed with his pillow in his arms. I ignore him at first, kind of scared of him. But I can't ignore him any longer when I hear him start to cry to himself.

It's such a lonely sound. His sobs are filled with pain.

I slip out of bed and walk over to his bed, struggling to fit my frame into the twin bed beside him. He tenses. "G-go Away." Nikki whimpers, moving away. "I don't want anybody else seeing this."

"Hey I'm a comforting person who cares way too much about feelings. I'm not gonna do anything harmful." I say softly.

Nikki nods and scoots back toward me, hugging me around the waist. I hold him until he falls asleep, but it's too uncomfortable for me to stay. Plus the night staff keeps checking in every 15 minutes, and the first time they showed up, I had to jump out of bed and pretend I was just checking on him.

I try to fall asleep, but it's hard with the nurses constantly coming in and shining lights in our faces. Nikki sleeps right through it though. Something else is keeping me awake as well. The unfamiliarness of the hospital, and my mysterious, green eyed roommate.