Unconditional [Namjin FF]

Reminiscence

SEOK JIN

It was still dark outside. I was in my bed staring at the ceiling. It is Friday, I glanced at my calendar, though I couldn't see it, I knew I had marked today's day with a red marker. The thing that I didn't know was that "next" Friday would arrive so fast. It seems like yesterday that I went to Namjoon's house and we sat on the wooden patio deck overlooking his garden. We had talked a lot that day. Honestly, I was quite shocked when I found that he is Jungkook's brother. But the thing that I'm glad about is, that there are no more misunderstandings now. He wasn't rude at all, he was really very sweet. And the thing that surprised me the most was that he found my habit of blabbering at top speed when I'm angry as cute. Most of the people get irritated due to that but he chuckled at it. And his dimple, oh goodness, they seemed to hit directly my heart. His eyes are so beautiful and he has so many moles on his face, seven to be exact. He has such beautiful hands, long fingers, wide palm, I had to fight my urge to intervene my fingers with his. 

I still can't get my mind off from his sudden move. The way he moved closer so suddenly, I'm sure my whole face had gone red. I thought he was going to kiss me, I had goosebumps all over me. I turned around and clenched the sheets at the thought of it. I don't even remember how many times I have replayed that scene in my head. Is today going to be a date? These past two weeks we had met before our classes started, grabbed coffee and doughnuts, we even made sure that we met each other during the breaks. Yoongi and Hobi were a bit shocked at first, but then we told them how our brothers unknowingly planned our meet. They were happy that we finally became friends, especially Yoongi, he always had this weird smile on his face when he saw us both together. 

One thing, I'm sure about is that, I have fallen for this boy. I mean how can't I? The way he listens to every single word coming out of my mouth. His kind gestures, his dimpled smile. There's so much to him that no one else could ever have. Every time he comes closer to me I feel butterflies in my stomach. I wish we held hands when we walk through the corridors or sit a little closer during our lunch breaks. I wish we were more than friends and this dinner was more than just an apology treat.

These few weeks have not been less than a roller coaster ride. A lot happened between me and Namjoon. He is very understanding, I haven't met a person who understood me better in such a short span of time. He seems to have a soft corner for me somewhere. The way his eyes light up every time we meet each other, he brings up a smile on his face every time he sees me. I wish I get a chance to be a part of his world, to be his special one.

NAMJOON

I looked at the clock, 4:15. I should better start getting ready. To be honest I was a bit nervous. I had planned the whole evening perfectly because I wanted him to know that my feelings have escalated beyond being friends. This dinner is going to be way more than just an apology treat. 

I called Seokjin because I wanted to know what he's wearing so that I can wear something similar to it. The phone hardly rang two times and it was answered. "Hey, Seokjin..." "Yes." His voice was barely a whisper. "Are you back from college?" I was pacing back and forth in my room. "Yeah, an hour back " I don't know why he was talking so softly. "I wanted to ask what you are wearing. Even the colour would do." 

"Umm... I'm not sure what I'm wearing yet. But I'm thinking of wearing a pink hoodie and white sneakers."

"Ah okay... Then... See you at 5" "Bye"

And I hung up the call. I think don't have a pink hoodie or sweatshirt. Kookie has, but it will be too small for me. I do have white sneakers and I can wear a blue hoodie because pink and blue go together. I left my house at 4:30 and by 5 I was standing in front of his apartment. 

I was going to make sure he knows that I'm in love with him. I can't go about another day knowing that this person exists and is not mine. The amount of comfort and joy he brings me can't be described in words. These past two weeks, gave me a chance to know him closely, understand him, and honestly, I haven't seen a more pure soul than him. Just being around him makes me forget all of my problems. I don't know if he feels the same way about me or not. But I'm adamant, I'm going to tell him today. He broke the wall that I have been putting up for people, and now I'm ready to let him in. I'm not afraid of the consequences this time.