Tell me when you're ready » Chae Hyungwon

19.

"Tell me something?" I ask the man sitting right next to me.

"Yes, do you mind?" He asks taking my hand and squeezes it lightly, I shake my head and let him lead the way to a different room, I guess for privacy reasons.

It is a small room, with a brown couch, a jukebox in the corner and a white rug to fill up further, that's it, that's the room.

Hyungwon let's go of my hand and takes place on the couch, he pets next to him to sign me that I should come over and sit next to him, so I do.

There we sit for quite a while, in silence, I must say I haven't felt this uncomfortable around Hyungwon in a long ass time.

He clears his throat and wipes his forehead, as if he had just ran a marathon.

I smile awkwardly next to him.

"So what is it you want to tell me?" I ask, mainly to fill up the silence that had become painfully awkward.

"Yeah, that't not really important" Hyungwon says and smiles awkwardly, as if his whole mind just changed, because it surely seemed important a couple minutes ago, I don't believe him.

He is hiding something.

"Hyungwon.." I say, not exactly sure how to put this into words. he just makes Ann 'hm' sound and looks at me.

"What is it? What are you hiding? What is going on inside your mind? You want to make this work right? Us? You want to make us work as much as I do? It isn't for nothing that you just ran away from your parents, if you want this to work, us, you have to communicate, tell me what is going on inside your brain, what are you thinking of? Because I know that you are hiding something, and it isn't 'not important', I know you Hyungwon" I tell him sighing right after those sentences, knowing he won't take this lightly.

"I umm, I know Faith, it's not that easy. I won't tell you all of it yet, because I am not ready and I am not sure that you are ready, I know you will act strong now and you will act like you are ready but I promise you that you are not." He tells me.

"So tell me, tell me in parts then, just small things, I want to know all about you Hyungwon, it's like you know me and my whole story, even the first words I have ever spoken, but do I know you? Like really know you? Do I? I am an open book to you but to me you feel like a complete stranger sometimes, that does not mean that you are, but it feels like it and I hate it, because I love you and I want to know every single part of you and your brain, your stories, your life path, why you made the decisions that you have made, tell me in parts not all of it at the same time, just open your pages for me not just the intro or the plot. I wanna know your story without having to break the pages" I tell him feeling my eyes tear up, I have never looked at it this way, from this angle, but it really does feel like he is a stranger sometimes.

He seems to understand and to be hit by my words, as his eyes tear up too. He pushes his lips against each other, making Ann expression as if he really is out of words.

"Take your time" I calm him, he laughs through his tears.

"You are so wise Faith, I am sorry that I glued some of my pages together so that no one can read them, even I forget about them sometimes, but I promise you that I will fix it, I will slowly rip them apart, make they read a little on the way, which makes it hard to read it back ut I will try my hardest." He tells me and a whole weight lifted off of my shoulders, as that was all that I wanted to hear, he is willing to open his book for me.

I smile at him wiping away the tears that formed on his cheeks.

"There obviously is a reason I have become who I am right now, and with those reasons come many tears and many breaks, and obviously you should know all those reasons, and all those parts of me, so I will start now, at the very beginning.."

He tells me and I smile as I get ready to listen to his story.