I'll always sing for you

Chapter 2 Change Of Direction

Gone, so what am I?
A soldier at war, no reason left to fight.

The plane hit turbulunce, not exactly helping the anxiety I was already having.

I grabbed the ends of my seat.

L.A could be seen outside of my window like feild of light.

The city's was encompased with the blazing hot sun, already making me long to be lying on some beach with a cold drink in my hand, and a thick layer of sun tanning lotion placed to help me get darker then I was. Moab sun though was nothing on California's.

I still couldn't believe I was doing this, though.

Moving in with my Aunt, leaving my greiving parents?

Of course, my parents were planning a vacation of their own; the Bahamas, being there destination of choice.

I couldn't help feel they'd suggested I come here to get rid of me. Maybe seeing me, hurt them. Maybe I reminded them of Cleif. We did look a like- or, had looked a like. We weren't identeical, obviously, but we'd still had the same hair color, (dark brown,) and eye color, (also brown.)

Or maybe if was seeing me so broken, that made them unable to look at me for another minute.

I wouldn't doubt that last one.

They were devistated too, but in my opinion, they hadn't had the connection to Cleif that I had. I mean, we'd been like the same person spilt in two since birth!

All the same though, I couldn't help wonder why they wanted me to move.

The plane landed not much later. I swear I wasn't breathing until it did. As soon as we hit the ground, and came to a stop, I heaved a big sigh. I preferred to be on solid ground. I was one of those people; if God intended man and woman to fly, he would have given them wings.

Once we were allowed to exit the plane, I took my rather large carry on bag, and purse with my lap top, and moved at a snail's pace into Sunny circumstances- L.A.

The heat was making me sweat like a melting popcicle, the second I walked into the parking lot. Hefting my giant suitcase and carry-on didn't help either.

Aunt Marcy drove a brand spanking new Porsche, and she wore sexy sunglass that had every male in the parking lot staring with lust, and every girl staring with jealously; except me. I just felt proud to call her my Aunt.

She wore a mini skirt too, showing off her way too tan legs, and a tight T-Shirt showing off her way too hot body.

My Aunt was a babe.

I smiled hugley, as I met her for a tight embrace outside of her hellish cool car.

"It's good to see you." She sighed, pulling away to look at me.

"You look better than when I saw you last, Laur."

I laughed. "You look as hot as ever, and of course I look better. Last month I hadn't showered, let alone brushed my hair for weeks."

"Yeah, you were a mess. Now look at you! I love your top, by the way."

I laughed again. I was wearing her very company's design, that she'd given me. It was a tight blue shirt with a slight dip in the cleavage area- not enough to make me uncomfortable, but just the amount to make it known I had something in way of breastst (not that much so, of course.)

It was a very darling top.

"Here, let me get your suitcase "

I'd only brought one suitcase besides my carry on. It wasn't much, but that was the point; starting over, beginning fresh. Once I had a job for the first time, I'd slowly buy all the things I needed back.

"Okay, I have the whole week off just to spend time with you." Aunt Marcy said, as she helped load my bags into her wide empty trunk.

"Shopping spree, is first on the agenda..." She closed the trunk.

"You barely have anything. Please tell me you own at least one dress. I wanted to go clubbing!"

I replied; "I have one... That designer black one you gave me. But I've yet to get a job, and my bank account is... What's the word? Shallow? Unexistent? So shopping may be a problem..."

Aunt Marcy laughed. "Baby doll, I've got enough in mine for the both of us. I've been a work aholic since after college and there's only so many porshes a person can buy before the neibors start talking. You and- well, you're the one person I can spend some of it on!"

She was going to say Cleif's name. I didn't know why everyone was scared to mention him around me. It wasn't like he isn't constantly on my mind anyway. I wasn't falling apart every second, right? And yet, it did sting a little to talk about him, so I wasn't complaining.

"I'll let you for now." I said with a forced smile. "Just until I have my own money, than I'll pull my weight... Too the best of my ability's."

"Except you won't be paying rent, as long as your under my roof!" Aunt Marcy said with a false stern expression.

"Darn it. I'll try and deal with your conditions." I laughed again, feeling giddily glad for all the exuses to laugh. It felt like a century since I'd just let loose and felt, well, happy.

"Let's get, before someone mugs us and steals my car." Aunt Marcy winked toward some guy who was blankly staring at us.

I hopped into the passenger side, instantly breathing in the cool air, and the strawberry freshener Aunt Marcy had hung over her rearview mirror. It smelled like her.

Under this scent, was the undeniable smell of a new car. Not that I'd smelled that much. My family always bought used vehicles, but Blossom had borrowed a new car from her uncle once, which I'd been in.

"So tomorrow night there's this live music thing at a coffee house. Wanna go?"

Live music. I cringed. I wanted to say no, wanted to yell no.

"Sure, why not?" Maybe I could fake an illness, or maybe I could get over my bad self and go. Some random singer at a coffee shop wasn't going to force me back into my old role as a musician. It might make me miss it: miss the feeling of the guitar strings against my fingers, the change of the chords, the feeling of the harmony when my voice met with the unique voice of my ceder wood, custom made, guitar.

But I hadn't played since that horrible concert. Horrible, because If I hadn't chosen to go on, I would have had more time with my brother. I could have said goodbye, even though he wouldn't have known it in his state at the time... Still, I'd lost those precious last minutes with him, because I assumed he'd be okay.

I would never look at music the same again. I'd never listen to my favorite songs, sing in the shower... Nothing that made me remember and hurt. I had no one to sing for anymore anyway. I wouldn't do it. Nope.

"Cool. They have amazing frappes there too. You'll love it."

I did love coffee. Maybe it would be fun? I'd give a shot, just in case.