Dancing With You| Obey Me! x reader (Oneshots)

Simeon❤(I Couldn't Tell You)

~Simeon is a famous human writer, who publishes his last short book about a mysterious character and another character like him. During a book meeting, he is asked about his motives but is met by the reader. Who the mysterious character in his book is about. One who he has fallen for helplessly. (I will not be going into that much detail about the characters in the book. Since the first part is a large part of the book he wrote and this mentions cheating, manipulation, and a very toxic relationship and mindset) ~
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I wish I could have pushed myself to tell you how I felt, but the overwhelming fear pulsed through me, telling me that I wasn’t good enough for you. As it tells me these things I often see you with a smile on your lips, almost like it was you who spoke them to me. I couldn’t tell you what I wanted, and that was you... 

It seems like I start with the useless world “Couldn’t” or the “I wish I…” but I know it means nothing and will not change anything as of today, today is here and yesterday has just passed. Yesterday now becomes a day we can never get back as it only stays in our minds and memories until forgotten. No matter what happens then or now, we are still the same person. 

How unfortunate, right?

You’re ashamed of yourself for what you are, what you did. But one shouldn’t because that is for others to do with useless points. You are here to build yourself up and possibly run into others who stumble on your path. It had been my luck to run across you, in my teenage years I had learned little and only dreamed of big things. Something I didn’t as a child. Only after meeting you did I want to make sure my dreams came true in hopes it would make you stay at my side, even if you no longer wanted me. At that moment I didn’t care if you only loved me for the money. And that had been something toxic I was willing to look over because it had been you I had ever only really cared about. 

In my short journey, I met many people, including many of those I remember nothing of as they are blurs of people I once crossed paths with. Maybe that's all we are. Maybe I had made my life only for you no longer caring about anyone else. I, in the end only saw the good in you and I have yet to see the bad. 

Not even after your constant betrayals I still found my heart wanting you because, in the end, my heart would only belong to you. 

I couldn’t tell you how many times I watched you fall apart before my eyes. How many times my heart ached each time you pushed me away with your cold gaze and cold voice. It was something I could never forget. Even then I still loved you and today I still do maybe that’s why I can’t stop thinking about you. 

I couldn’t tell you how much I wanted to hold you in my arms, though your constant nights away had prevented that. Your midnight meetings with others, who seemed to have taken your heart from me. Only for you to forget them the next day when you stumble through the door with a heated look in your eyes. Something I remember seeing on a constant. 

Though even then I was never able to tell you how much I needed you. The nights your arms were around me and mine around you. Something stuck in my mind and I couldn’t rid myself of them. 

When you left, I was too late to tell you how much I loved you and how much you really meant to me. Because of constant fear in my heart, it drew you away until your back was facing me. I never saw your smile after that day. I only wished to see it again even if you spat harsh words in my direction. Even if you meant it, it would never drive me away…