DNF Oneshots (Dreamnotfound)

Are you okay?

((TW: Depression))

Buzz Buzz Bu-

The phone instantly stops ringing as George taps the screen lazily, "Shut the fuck up." he mumbles trying to cover himself back underneath his navy-blue sheets. It was about 2pm and he had yet to get out of bed and get ready for the day, which the sun bleeding through his partially closed curtains brought.

George abruptly sat up, rubbing his eyes as he became dizzy. Once his vision returned to normal, he looked over at his phone. It normally wasn't this obnoxious, who was texting him and why? All he wanted to do was be left alone today, ignoring any problems or anxieties he had.

Buzz Buzz-

George finally gave in, grabbing his annoying phone off the bedside table. His phone lit up brightly in his dark room, he groaned and dragged his hand along his face to help wake him up a bit. This helped a bit, his eyes adjusting to the brightness of the phone as he read his notifications from the person who was messaging him.

Clay <3
Good morning, sunshine!
Sent at 10am
You haven't talked to me recently, how are you?
George
George!
Hellooo~
Sent at 11am
Hey, wanna meet up later? I want to talk to you!
:'(
Sent at 2pm

George simply read through all of the texts, guilt building up in him like air blowing into a balloon, soon to burst. He didn't want to ignore his boyfriend. Clay was right, they hadn't talked in a bit, that being a day or two. George just didn't want his lover to see him like this. He had been resting in bed for the last couple of days, ignoring his close family and friends. He wasn't entirely sleeping the whole time, so his eyes had dark solemn circles. George also hadn't eaten over these days, his body felt frail and weak.

George sighed, deciding he should at least reply to Clay so that he doesn't become worried. So, he sent a simple, 'Sure, what time?' hoping Clay wouldn't ask any questions. After George's text sent, there was an instant reply.

Clay <3
Hello! Um, how about 3pm?
I'll come over to your place.

George mentally cringed. He didn't want Clay to come to his place and see how messy it was or how little food was in the house. He didn't want Clay to worry about him. All he wanted was this ever-looming shadow to leave him. All he wanted was to feel happy and at peace with himself. Yet, none of those wants would come true as he didn't know how to get rid of the shadow and he felt as if he couldn't feel emotion right now.

George could only feel undeserving. Undeserving of his wonderful boyfriend. Undeserving of his caring friends. Undeserving of the amazing job he had, that being a content creator. George didn't even have to try to get these things, he was just given the luck of the gods.

Luck

What a funny thing luck is. Everyone has luck, some having more than others, but everyone has it. It's like fate but you have a choice to how you react. You can either accept the lucky chance or you can throw it away, watch it burn to ashes inside your anxious mind. As for George, he didn't accept it. Instead, he chose to light it on fire with the words, "I don't deserve this." Why you may ask. Well, he simply let his anxiety get the better of him, he let the panic inducing thoughts invade and change his perception.

His thoughts of shame were interrupted by his phone buzzing again.

Clay <3
I'll be there in 5.

"No, that gives me no time!" George quickly swung his covers off himself, showing his thin, pale, body. He instantly looked away, too tired to feel guilty, and began to get dressed. He chose some light grey sweats and a beige sweater. He looked into his long mirror, which laid against the bedroom walls, and smiled. It brought him comfort to be in these baggy clothes, covered up any imperfections he thought he had. His eyes trailed up to his face. George traced his dark circles with his hand and ran his fingers through his messy bed hair. Maybe I should situate that, he thought, walking to his bathroom.