Stormy Days To Drown Out The Screams - Luke Patterson

Chapter 14

Disclaimer - I don't own jatp 

TW - inferred mentions of abuse and a panic attack

Willie had taken us to a club. I mean, I wasn't complaining, I was always down for some music and dancing, but why the hell was this super powerful wizard dude at a club? I mean I was kinda expecting an abandoned cabin in the middle of the woods, or a Hogwarts style massive castle. Would this guy even have a beard? I gasped as a thought struck me. What if he didn't have a hat? Hats are a very important aspect of a wizard's wardrobe. I was pulled from my thoughts when a hand encircled my wrist. 

 *TW Begins* 

Don't flinch. Don't flinch. Don't flinch. The hand dragged me forward, through a pair of huge, ornate doors. I couldn't flinch. I'd give everything away. Don't pull away. Don't pull away. Don't pull away. The person pulling me chuckled at something another person said, my thoughts too loud to hear anything. The world felt like a fish bowl, sounds far away and distorted. But I recognised that chuckle. Luke. It's not him. It's not him. It's not him. Anxiety still clawed at my throat, stealing the breath from my lungs and sending my mind into a frenzy of echoing thoughts. Panic seized my chest, adrenaline coursing through my veins as my fight or flight instincts kicked in. You're safe. You're safe. You're safe. I desperately tried to convince myself, the hand around my wrist holding me hostage in my panic, keeping me from breaking free of the trap my own mind had set for me. I pulled away. Rubbing my wrist as my panic began to settle, I looked up to see Luke giving me a curious glance as to why I pulled away. Idiot. Now you've really fucked everything up. God, you can't ever seem to do anything right can you? I pushed the voices to the back of my mind and focused on Luke's hazel eyes. 

*TW Ends* (Basically just Luke grabbed her wrist 'cause she zoned out and she had a mini panic attack and pulled away) 

(Still mentions of anxiety and rising panic, build up to a panic attack)

"Your hand was sweaty," I lied, putting on a smirk to make the jab believable. Luke seemed to believe it, rolling his eyes. I breathed a sigh of relief. He didn't know. Thank fucking god. Soon we were inside the club, Willie saying something to us before turning and leaving with a smile. I could still feel the ghost of his hands around my neck, lost in a cloud of my thoughts. I'd almost revealed everything. How could I be so stupid? I couldn't let them suspect anything. Alex already figured out my music, and the other two were probably suspicious. This was one secret that they could never know. No matter what. 

"...you can hide behind me," I heard Alex say to Reggie, "I'll be hiding behind Luke." My lips curved into a weak smile as he moved behind Luke who rolled his eyes. You never had anyone to hide behind, the voice in the back of my mind reminded me. I shook my head, willing the voice to go away. Not now. Please not now. I just had to hold on for now. We wouldn't be here for long - just enough to ask that ghost Willie mentioned how to make the boys visible - and then it would be their performance at the dance and then I was done. No problem. I could stick it out that long. All I had to do was keep the voices at bay until it was over. How hard could it be? "...I'm still hiding behind Luke," Alex said, clearly replying to something Luke had said that had been drowned out by my thoughts. Willie came over and told us we were allowed in. I followed the boys down the stairs, entering the sea of brightly coloured, smiling people. Desperately trying to reign in my rising panic, I focused on the back of Luke's head. Taking a seat at the table with the boys, I plastered a small smile on my face, pretending to mirror the boys' expressions of wonder as they looked around the club when I just felt detached from reality. Suddenly the room went quiet, a loud voice introducing someone, my head feeling like I was underwater. A man appeared in a puff of purple smoke above the stage.