Trapped By Destiny

46| The pain inside

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Third person pov

Over the past few days, randeep acted very suspicious but she couldn't tell why. He have no reason to be suspicious at least from her point of view.

A fear gripped her as she saw him distancing himself from her day by day. She sure knows that he was upset about of the rejection he got from the TV show, he even let her soothe him but this is not it. There is something more to the story.

Randeep is not a person who rely on one particular thing, he doesn't hang around the problem for a long time. It was hard for him to get rejected at the last minute but he was quick to come out of it. He was confident enough about his talent and decided to not rely on it too much.

Over the last few days, Every time their eyes meet, it was cold and not warm anymore. That is when she decided to break the ices...

She decided to ask him about his cold behaviour which turned into a heated argument and ended up one sleeping on the couch.

This has become a routine.

She felt devastated and thought everything went out of hand when he came back home late and sometimes drunk. Though it was just some gulps but still anyone can tell from the rusty alcohol smell.

Ashi acted like it doesn't bother her but she was completely lost. For the first time, she was not understanding his behaviour. The pain in her heart grew bigger....

Likewise one casual evening, Ashi prepared dinner for both of them and waited for his arrival. She wore his favourite black dress which rested above her knee and made his favourite Aloo paratha and matar paneer.

She didn't realise it was midnight when she heard a knock on the door. She stood frozen when she opened the door to find him leaning on zain. Completely drained in alcohol. Muttering incoherent words with closed eyes. Zain looked at her with guilty eyes.

She opened the door fully with tears unknowingly spilling over her cheeks, zain pulled him by one arm around his waist and made him lie down in his bedroom.

When zain came back he saw ashi standing there rooted, staring at a distance with tears silently spilling over her cheeks, hands twisting the door knob.

The only good thing he did was going to the bar at the right moment before he could get anymore drunk.

His heart wrenched at the petite figure standing before him. He looked down helplessly. His own eyes filled with tears, how this girl became his own sister over the years.

He looked up again at the sobbing figure and he quickly pulled her into a brotherly hug. He held her trembling figure in a soothing way. His annoyance and outrage for his friend reached its peak. After pulling away he waited for her to shower him with questions but to his surprise she silently muttered a 'thanks' for bringing Randeep back home.

He offered to stay but she was able to utter "aap chaliyea, Mujhe aadat hogai.." and gave a bitter smile

***

She stood leaning beside the balcony door and gazing the dark sky filled with minimum stars. The moon felt uninvited among the glowing stars but still dominated the others.

Cold September breeze travelled across the balcony sending her chills. She turned and saw the young boy who swept her feet away, made her fall in love immensely and showed her a future together.

The pain in her heart grew bigger... she sucked her lower lip, as tears rolled down her cheek. All these days she didn't want to pressurise him for a answer but not anymore. Her sadness turned into anger. She was furious at him for getting drunk

"A-ashiii..." But she didn't knew his mere voice is enough to melt and subside her anger.

She turned to find him lying on his stomach and eyes half opened. He wriggled pushing the pillows and muttered incoherent words.

She didn't dare to take a step, she knew she might break down if they had a conversation right now. Anyway, he is not in a state to have a talk.

"ASHII.." He yelled. His voice filled with pain. Eyes closed. Slamming his hand on the pillow.

She took few steps towards him. He didn't move or talk for the next few minutes. She assumed him to be asleep due to the alcohol he consumed. She took few more steps and sat beside him near the footboard.

She looked at his sleeping figure, his long lashes lying over his cheeks, his tear stained cheeks didn't went unnoticed. By then she knows it's not only her even he was in pain. She wanted to hide in his arms and make all his pain go numb. But she wanted answers for all her questions.

It was hard to see him like this so she tried to get up and occupy the couch tonight but before she could, a hand got hold of her wrist. She looked behind to find him holding her hand with half opened eyes.

"Mat jao... please" Though she made no attempt to move away from him he muttered silently as a flash of pain ran across his face. "Mujhe chod ke Mat jao.. maina"

maina-

She felt alive again after hearing those words. The name she cherished. She saw her randeep who went lost ten days back.

He pulled her with a weak force making her sit before him. "M-mainaa..." he uttered again silently, having no response he called out again "Ashi..."

As much as she wanted him to talk his heart out she didn't want to have a conversation right now. she hesitantly mouthed a 'hmm' which encouraged him to go on.

"Muh-Mujhe.. maaf ka-ro, Mujhe... Aise Tum-tumari saat.." His eyes wear closed as he uttered.

She tried not to break down and uttered quickly "kya keh rahe ho?"
If she was confused before she didn't know what to call his behaviour now. This is the only time she couldn't understand his feelings.

"mujhe tumari saath aisa nahi karana chaayea tha.. main s-sach mein aisa nahi..."

"Matlab? Kya keh rahe ho Randeep?" She went curious to know what he wanted to say. She was unable to understand the thoughts that had flooded her mind.

"Lekin ye sach hai... main tumse bohot pyaar karta Hun... i-i love y-you maina..."

Ashi went to dazed to even understand anything. Out of all, she didn't expected to hear these words at this moment. His every action effected her to an extent that she was consumed by a restlessness she had never felt. Her heart was pounding in a pace that she didn't know it was capable of.

"m-maine ek bohot badi.. galti kiya.."

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This chapter was emotional to write and it might get more emotional in the next chapter 😭

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With ❤️