Attack on Titan: Aftermath

Some Wounds Don't Heal

"This is our stop." Annie said getting off the train with Reiner.

"The anticipation is killing me" Reiner snickered. Annie wasn't laughing. A short walk and there Annie and Reiner were.

The sign read "Trost District Graveyard."

"Oh." Reiner said with a ghostly expression.

"C'mon" Annie gestured. A short walk in the graveyard and they stopped by a stone that read "Marco Bodt."

"Marco..." Reiner whispered, his lips trembling.

"This is what started it for you isn't it? Your bipolar disorder. I figured this might help your recovery" Annie said sternly. "I visit here quite often."

"I... I see..."

"Is there anything you'd like to say to him?" Annie asked.

"Say? He's dead. There's no point. He wouldn't hear me." Reiner said expressionless.

"How do you know that?" Annie questioned.

"I..." Reiner hesitated. "Marco... I... I am so... sorry." His knees were shaking. "Could you ever forgive me..." He said with a loss for words. "No. I can't forgive myself. I wanted to end my own life for so long and it all started with taking yours. The only time I felt appreciated was my time as a soldier here. With you Marco. With Eren, Mikasa, Jean, with everyone. If me and Bertholdt had let you live. Maybe we would've been stopped sooner. I should've sided with you all... but my mother..." he paused once again. His knees broke as he fell onto the lush green grass that covered the ground above Marco's body. "No. I killed countless mothers and their children that day I broke the wall. But... I was a child myself." Reiner got back up and his lips stopped trembling. He turned towards Annie.

"Is that all?" she asked.

"I... we both have done awful things that are impossible to atone for. Apologizing to corpses doesn't do anything but relieve our consciences. I don't know about you, but I'd never be able to forgive myself for that day. Me being brainwashed doesn't excuse it, and even if it meant never seeing my mother again. But, I think we've both come to peace with what we've done though. Can you sleep at night?"

Annie paused before answering. "I've always been able to sleep at night. My father is the reason why we are different. However, Marco made it harder that night. I came here to see how he's doing, figured it might help you with your 'issue' too."

"My disorder was addressed back when I was an ambassador for Marley. Although the job was stressful so self isolating helped me become myself again. There were too many triggers that made me forget who I was. Reiner, the upstanding soldier who fought for humanity within the walls, and put an end to Eren Jaeger's terror. Or Reiner, the bloodstained, cold blooded, murdering, warrior that fought to bring down the world's judgment on those deemed necessary. I've felt like reinventing myself but living a life ignorant of a purpose has been... blissful to say the least. So whether I'm myself or just a persona I created once again, well..." He drifted off sitting down with his back against the side of Marco's grave. "It makes my head hurt thinking about it."

"I get it." Annie said, sitting next to him.

"I take it Bertholdt never got a gravestone" Reiner assumed.

"Not one that I know of..."

"So that's a no then."

"Yeah..."

"Well if I dread the past any longer I might have another episode. You can't change what's been done." Reiner said getting up and reaching his hand out to Annie.