Dealing with Ourselves : Fred Weasley

48

          The Easter Holiday comes faster than I thought. I didn't even know we were on it until Reno reminded me. Every day that Reno and I sit in the Great hall for meals I expect the twins to go onto their next big prank. And every day I am disappointed. On the last day of the holiday, I decided to ask them about it. 
     "So why haven't you started your second plan yet?" I ask as we sit outside near the lake. "Ah, because love. What was the point, we asked ourselves, of disrupting leisure time?" Fred says with a smile. "No point at all, we answered ourselves. And of course, we'd have messed up people's studying too, which would be the very last thing we'd want to do." I lightly laugh. "Since when do you care about studying?" I ask amused. "We don't care about us studying. We don't want to disrupt others though," George answers. 
     "But it's business as usual from tomorrow," Fred says while picking up a rock and throwing it into the lake. "But Fred, we have a bit of business today. Remember," George says with a grin. Fred soon gets the same look. "You are so right George. How could I forget?"  "What are you going to do today?" I ask curiously. Looking up at them both from the ground. They both look at me with evil grins. Fred starts walking over. 
     Oh no... I get up so I can run but before I can Fred scoops me up and puts me over his shoulder. "Come on Fred! Put me down!" I say while wiggling to get free. He laughs. "Not this time love," Fred says while walking. I turn to see where he is going while trying to get free. He is going to the lake. Oh no... He is going to throw me in... 
     "No! PLease! I can't swim!" I lie. The twins laugh. "We asked Reno, he said that you love swimming," George says while watching. Fred stops right in front of the water. George walks over and takes my glasses off my face. "Wouldn't want you to lose those," He says before stepping away. "You might want to plug your nose love," He says before throwing me into the cold water. The cold slaps me as I go under. I sink down a little bit before I swim up. Once my head is out I take a few deep breaths. The twins are laughing onshore. I swim over and walk out, shivering. 
      "You both are assholes," I say while hugging myself to keep warm. They laugh for a little longer before George walks over and hands me a towel. "We are partially hairless because of you. You deserved this," George says amused. "Yea, my arm hair still hasn't grown back," Fred says while crossing his arms, an amused look on his face. 
     I suppose that is true. I dry my arms off with the towel and then my face and hair. "Can I have my glasses back?" I ask then after my hair stops dripping. They look at me and laugh harder. "What? What is funny?" I ask worried Fred walks over and hands me my glasses and a mirror. I quickly put my glasses on then look in the mirror to find that my hair is green. A loud gasp escapes me. "Man, there must be something in that water," George says in between laughing. I hand Fred the mirror and wrap the towel around myself. 
     "Haha, yes very funny. I am going to shower, see you later," I say before walking away and back to the castle. Leaving them rolling around laughing. It was a good prank, I will give them that. I would be laughing along with them if I wasn't so cold. And I really don't want to get sick again. So I will laugh with them about it later. 
     
     "It doesn't look too bad," Reno says trying to hide his amusement that night at dinner. "It looks kinda cool," Harmony adds, sitting with us today. I slightly smile at them. "Thanks, I guess. I was really hoping it would wash out though. I don't think Umbridge will be happy about it," I say dreading having to go to class tomorrow with green hair. 
     "Maybe she won't care," Harmony says trying to be optimistic. I slightly smile at her. "I appreciate your optimism, but I doubt that." I look over to the Gryffindor table and see the twins. "I'll be back. I'm going to ask how long it will last," I say before standing. I walk over and sit next to Harry at the Gryffindor table. 
     "What happened to you?" Ron asks looking at my hair with a shocked expression. Several of the Gryffindors laugh while looking in my direction. "Ask the twins," I say while looking at Fred and George, who both ook very amused. "She wanted a war, so she got one," George says innocently. "How long will it last?" I ask them hopeful that they will say only a few hours. 
     "Right," Fred starts. "About that," George says. "You are the first person we tested it on," Fred says. "But we did test it on a mouse, but we couldn't change the hair back," George says. I look at them in disbelief. "Are you telling me that I have to just let my hair grow out into its natural colour?"  "More than likely," They say at the same time. I take a deep breath. 
     "On the bright side at least no one can say anything about you looking like me," Harry says amused. "And it doesn't look bad," Hermione adds, not looking amused, but actually sounding sincere. "You have to help us test stuff out if you want to be part of the business," Fred adds. "They do stuff like that with me all the time," Lee says with a light laugh. "You should probably get a lock for your bedroom door when you move in with us," George adds. 
     "What?" Harry asks suddenly. Oh great... Thanks, George... "You are moving in with us?" Ron asks confused. "No. After we move out," Fred says to Ron. "You are moving in with them?" Harry asks me. "Uh... Yea, that was the plan," I say suddenly wanting to go back to the Hufflepuff table. "What do you mean when you love out?" Ron asks. "Where did you get the money to get your own place?" Hermione asks. "Never you mind where we got the money. Just keep quiet about it," George says. 
     "Why do you-"  "I will see you lot later," I say quickly standing. Cutting Harry off, I don't want this to turn into an argument. I walk back over and sit at the Hufflepuff table with Reno and Harmony. "Well, how long will it last?" Reno asks me. I sigh. "They don't know. They said it will probably just stay until it grows out," I say while getting some potatoes. "At least your hair grows fast," Harmony says optimistically. 

     The next day I hear more people laughing about my hair. I figure them though. After looking at it in the mirror for a long time before bed I decided that it isn't too bad and it does like kind of nice. I still have a large about of dread as I walk into Umbridge's class and take a seat with the twins. 
     As soon as she walks into the room and sees me she gasps. Yep... Here we go. "Miss West! What is going on with your hair! Why is it green?" she asks seeming slightly mortified. "Is it green? I hadn't noticed," I say sounding innocent. I look at a strand of my hair. Maybe playing innocent will work. "You look ridiculous! I expect you to have it back to normal by tomorrow morning," she says as if the matter is settled. 
     "Funny thing about that, Professor. It is kind of permanent," I say slowly. I brace myself for her wrath. "Permanent?" She repeats. "It's our fault professor. We were playing a joke on her," Fred says quickly. "Yea, she didn't have any say in it, it's not her fault," George adds quickly. Umbridge looks between them. "Very well, detention for you both until Madam Pomfrey is able to change it back to normal," Umbridge says before starting her 'lesson'. 

     "Maybe it will be during dinner," Reno suggests when I tell him that the twins said the next thing they have planned is happening today. We walk down the corridor and suddenly hear loud noises. "Or it is now, come on!" I say before basically running to where the sounds are coming from. Harry runs out of Umbridge's room and looks at us. "Is she around?" He asks quickly. "No," I say quickly. We hurry into the entrance hall again. 
     Students start forming a ring just like the night when Trelawney had been sacked. Students are standing all around the walls in a great ring. Some of them covered in a substance that looked very like Stinksap. Teachers and ghosts were also in the crowd. Prominent among the onlookers were members of the Inquisitorial Squad, who were all looking exceptionally pleased with themselves, and Peeves, who is bobbing overhead, gazed down upon Fred and George, who stood in the middle of the floor with the unmistakable look of two people who had just been cornered. 
     "So!" Umbridge says triumphantly. She is only standing a few stairs in front of us on the stairs. I sneak past her and join the crowd, pushing my way to the front. "So... you think it amusing to turn a school corridor into a swamp, do you?" "Pretty amusing, yeah," Fred says, looking back up at her without the slightest sign of fear.
     Filch elbows his way closer to Umbridge, almost crying with happiness. "I've got the form, Headmistress," he says hoarsely, waving the piece of parchment. "I've got the form and I've got the whips waiting... Oh, let me do it now..."
     "Very good, Argus," she says. "You two," she goes on, gazing down at Fred and George, "are about to learn what happens to wrongdoers in my school."   "You know what?" Fred says. "I don't think we are." He turns to his twin. "George," Fred says, "I think we've outgrown full-time education." "Yeah, I've been feeling that way myself," George says lightly. "Time to test our talents in the real world, d'you reckon?" Fred asks. "Definitely," George says with a smile.
     Before Umbridge can say a word, they raise their hands and say together, "Accio Brooms!" a loud crash comes from somewhere in the distance. Fred and George's broomsticks, one still trailing the heavy chain and iron peg with which Umbridge had fastened them to the wall, were hurtling along the corridor toward their owners.
     They turn left, streak down the stairs, and stop sharply in front of the twins, the chain clattering loudly on the flagged stone floor. "We won't be seeing you," Fred says to Umbridge, swinging his leg over his broomstick. "Yeah, don't bother to keep in touch," George says, mounting his own.
     Fred looks around at the assembled students, and at the silent, watchful crowd. "If anyone fancies buying a Portable Swamp, as demonstrated upstairs, come to number ninety-three, Diagon Alley — Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes," he says in a loud voice. "Our new premises!"
     "Special discounts to Hogwarts students who swear they're going to use our products to get rid of this old bat," George adds, pointing at Umbridge. Fred is still scanning the crowd. I quickly push my way to the front. His eyes stop on me and his smile grows. He walks over and quickly kisses me. "I love you, see you in a few months," He says with a wink. I don't get any time to reply before Umbridge yells. 
          "STOP THEM!" Umbridge screams, but it is too late. As the Inquisitorial Squad closes in, Fred and George kick off from the floor, shooting fifteen feet into the air, the iron peg swinging dangerously below. Fred looks across the hall at the poltergeist bobbing on his level above the crowd.
     "Give her hell from us, Peeves." And Peeves, who had never taken an order from a student before, swept his belled hat from his head and sprang to a salute as Fred and George wheeled about to tumultuous applause from the students below and sped out of the open front doors into the glorious sunset. 
      
     The story of Fred and George's flight to freedom was retold so often over the next few days that I think it is safe to say it will soonbecome the stuff of Hogwarts legend. Within a week, even those whohad been eyewitnesses were half-convinced that they had seen thetwins dive-bomb Umbridge on their brooms, pelting her with Dungbombs before zooming out of the doors. In the immediate aftermathof their departure, there was a great wave of talk about copying them
     I would frequently hear students saying things like, "Honestly,some days I just feel like jumping on my broom and leaving thisplace," or else, "One more lesson like that and I might just do aWeasley..."
     The twins had not left instructions on howto remove the swamp that now filled the corridor on the fifth floor ofthe east wing. Umbridge and Filch had been observed trying differentmeans of removing it but without success. Eventually, the area wasroped off and Filch, gnashing his teeth furiously, was given the task ofpunting students across it to their classrooms. 
     I am almost positive that McGonagall or Flitwick could remove the swampin an instant, but just as in the case of Fred and George's WildfireWhiz-Bangs, they seemed to prefer to watch Umbridge struggle. I don't blame them, I prefer it as well. 
     Inspired by Fred and George's example, a great number of studentswere now vying for the newly vacant positions of Troublemakers-in chief. Somebody managed to slip a hairy-snouted niffler into Umbridge's office, which promptly tore the placeapart in its search for shiny objects, leapt on Umbridge on her reentrance, and tried to gnaw the rings off her stubby fingers.
     Dungbombsand Stinkpellets were dropped so frequently in the corridors that it became the new fashion for students to perform Bubble-Head Charmson themselves before leaving lessons, which ensured them a supply offresh clean air, even though it gave them all the peculiar appearance ofwearing upside-down goldfish bowls on their heads.
     Filch prowled the corridors with a horsewhip ready in his hands,desperate to catch miscreants, but the problem was that there werenow so many of them that he did not know which way to turn. TheInquisitorial Squad were attempting to help him, but odd things kepthappening to its members.
     Warrington of the Slytherin Quidditchteam reported to the hospital wing with a horrible skin complaint thatmade him look as though he had been coated in cornflakes. PansyParkinson, to Hermione's delight, missed all her lessons the followingday, as she had sprouted antlers.
     The night the twins had left Lee came up to me to tell me that the twins left several Skiving Snackboxes for him and me to sell. I happily took to selling them in the Hufflepuff common room as Lee sold them in Gryffindor's. It's not as if we needed to though, the number of students who bought them from the twins is unbelievable. 
     Peeves, who seemed to have taken Fred's partingwords deeply to heart. Cackling madly, he soared through the school,upending tables, bursting out of blackboards, and toppling statuesand vases. Twice he shut Mrs Norris inside suits of armour, from whichshe was rescued, yowling loudly, by the furious caretaker.
     He smashedlanterns and snuffed out candles, juggled burning torches over theheads of screaming students, caused neatly stacked piles of parchmentto topple into fires or out of windows, flooded the second floor whenhe pulled off all the taps in the bathrooms, dropped a bag of tarantulas in the middle of the Great Hall during breakfast and, whenever hefancied a break, spent hours at a time floating along after Umbridgeand blowing loud raspberries every time she spoke.None of the staff but Filch seemed to be stirring themselves to helpher.
     The days seem to go by much slower now without the twins. The last week of May has finally rolled over. When I'm not spending time with Reno I am with Harmony. Or a lot of the time both of them. Today it is just Reno. We are walking back from the library after an evening of studying. "Just study with me tomorrow, please?" Reno begs. "I am going to watch the Quidditch game, I'm sorry Reno," I say for the final time. 
     "What do you have to say for yourself?" We heard from around the corner. We stop quickly. We don't want to have to run into Umbridge any more than we have to. Especially me, she is still unhappy about my green hair. "I um... I'm sorry?" A familiar voice says. I peek around the corner and see Harmony. No... I hand Reno my books and dig around in my bag until I find something to distract Umbridge. 
     "What are you doing?" Reno whispers. I sigh and take out my inkwell and chuck it down the corridor in front of Umbridge. It shatters loudly and ink goes everywhere. She quickly turns around and looks at me. "West! What on earth are you doing?" she asks looking shocked. I look behind myself and then back at her. "Are you talking to me, Professor? I thought we have been over this. My last name is Potter," I say hoping she will forget about whatever Harmony was doing. 
     Umbridge's face turns red in anger. "Detention all week Miss West! And you," she turns back to Harmony. "Detention tomorrow night."  "No!" I loudly say. Umbridge looks back at me. "Excuse me?" My mind runs quickly, trying to find something to say. "Harmony was just covering for me so I wouldn't get in trouble. She wasn't actually doing anything wrong," I quickly say. Umbridge glances at Harmony then at me. 
     "I would believe you if I didn't catch her with the dungbombs. I expect to see you both tomorrow afternoon. Now get to bet. Goodnight," Umbridge says before walking away. Reno walks over and hands me my things. "What was that all about?" He asks me confused. "I was trying to get Harmony out of trouble..." I say feeling defeated. 
     "You shouldn't have done any of that, now you are in trouble too," Harmony says walking over to me. "I was trying to get you out of trouble. Her detention is the worst. Snape's is better than hers..." I can see a bit of fear flash in Harmony's eyes. 

     It is pretty lonely without the twins. By the time I finish my week of detention, I think I have a good few permanent scars on my hand and arm from that horrible woman. I am forced to wear long sleeves in the hot weather. I make sure to drink lots of water so it is a bit more bearable. 
     After two weeks of not hearing from Fred, I ask Lee and Ron if either of them has heard anything. They both tell me the same thing, no. Umbridge is probably not letting their letters come through. The next upcoming week is utterly boring and stressful. It's exam week. The fifth years are taking their O.W.Ls and us seventh years are taking our N.E.W.Ts. Reno and I spend every night studying. But when it finally ends I feel as if I have done an okay job. I suppose I will just have to let the days draw on as I wait for the term to end.