by my side | jaywon

06

——
"i didn't see his* love
i felt it
as plainly as the sun."
- atticus -
——
part six:

Jungwon and Jay's most said phase had to be "We're just friends." It's been one of the constant topics: if Jungwon and Jay were together. It was mid February and everyone was finally calming down from the dance, one of their biggest activities was finally over.

"You guys were so cute at the dance" Was what Jungwon heard once from one of his classmates. Maybe a few actually but it still shocked him that people were paying attention and saw them together. But being constantly asked made Jungwon think about it over and over again. What is he to Jay? What is Jay to him? Are they really just friends? He hated it, he hated not knowing how he actually felt. Jungwon always had full control over his thought and feelings but this, this was something else.

"Hey, Wonie!" Jay exclaimed, grabbing onto his hand to get his attention. It was Monday morning just before class would begin and Jay had followed him all the way to his homeroom. "Yes?" He was blushing furiously. Jay had been acting just a little bit different ever since the dance and he may or may not have initiated every single one of their conversations since.

"Do you want to eat lunch together?" Jungwon pulled his hand away to reach into his backpack, taking out his pencil case and notebook. He swore he saw Jay pout a little. "I mean don't we always eat lunch with the others?" Jungwon laughed only to see that Jay was in fact, not. He had a straight, expecting face, and he came to a consensus that Jay was genuinely asking.

"I mean, of course. Let's eat together" "Okay I'll wait for you then! Anyways I have to get going, I might be late for homeroom" Jay exclaimed and waved before running off to his class. The younger stood in confusion before going to sit in his seat. What was that? He also noticed that Jay has been a lot more touchy with him. They couldn't go a single conversation without Jay touching or coming into contact with him at least once. He didn't mind at all.
Jungwon just didn't like how he had to fight the urge to smile whenever he had skinship with Jay.

— 𖤐 —

Jungwon looks at him with love. Scratch that, he looks at everyone with a similar expression. Eyes, full of admiration and respect for the other. Jay likes to convince himself that Jungwon looks at him differently but recently, he hasn't seen it. He hasn't seen the look that he gives Jay when they're together in a while, well at least since the dance. Did I do something?

Why would Jay think of such things? Jungwon wasn't ignoring him, Jungwon wasn't pushing him away but, it didn't feel the same as before the dance. Throughout the weekend he texted Jungwon whenever he had the time and he even woke up bright and early to make sure he was there to walk with him in the morning. He thought something special had happened between them during and after the dance. I guess I was wrong.

— 𖤐 —

Jay hates to be a fuss, he hates complaining. But he really believes there is something between him and Jungwon. Yes, the younger has been pulling away from all of his touches and even avoids eye contact from time to time but, Jay still persists on. I'm trying, I'm really trying here.

"Maybe he's just a little... nervous? Maybe he's trying to figure out his feelings" That was what Jake said to comfort his distressed best friend. Everyone but Jungwon and Sunoo was at Jay's house. The topic of Jungwon immediately came to light. Who could blame them? Everyone could see how Jay would approach and lead on Jungwon but the younger would pretend as if he didn't see it and carried on.

"But we—I... I know there has to be something, even before the dance there was something. But now he—" Heeseung put a reassuring hand on his shoulder before sending him a little laugh. "Jay-ah, don't stress out about it. This is Jungwon we're talking about, hm? You know he wouldn't just do something for the heck of it, everything he does is for a reason" Jay enjoyed all of the advice he was receiving, all of the comfort, but he too had things on his mind he needed to get out.