💘 The daydreamers 💘

Empty again

I woke up again after a couple hours and it was around six in the afternoon, I looked over to my side and Fuckshit was asleep facing me.

His hair was messy and kinda covering his face and he was wearing a sweater which covered his arms past his wrists, I laid facing him and closed my eyes before I felt him plant a kiss on my forehead.

I smiled and opened my eyes to see a sleepy Fuckshit laughing quietly, he wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head on my chest before saying

"hey cutie..."

"hey sleepyhead..."

"you sleep okay?"

"i slept fine, you?"

"mmm.... pretty good..."

He was still sleepy and his voice was raspy, I played with his hair for a bit before Ray called me.

"man, just let it ring n****....."

"alright sleepybear..."

He smiled and kissed my neck before mumbling softly

"why the fuck am i so fucking tired?"

"i don't know man, i'm tired but i can't fall back asleep."

He nodded and sat up before rubbing his eyes, my phone buzzed again and this time it was my brother Scott.

"Scott?"

"um, have you heard?"

"about?"

"dad, um.... he's dead, for real this time."

"you better not be fucking with me."

"no, he overdosed."

I hung up and got up before I got dressed,

"what's going on?"

"don't worry about it."

"syd-"

"i said don't fucking worry about it!"

Once I had my things together I left. I didn't know if he was behind me or not but I skated off, not to my house but to Stevie's. His older brother is my dealer and I need something from him to ease the pain, once I got to his driveway I knocked on his back door before Stevie came out.

"Rehab?"

"Hey, where's your brother?"

"Inside, why?"

"Tell him I need to see him."

He nodded and went back inside to get him, a couple minutes passed and Ian walked out.

"Aris?"

"Ian. Look, I need Xanax, molly, coke, god anything but meth."

"Jeez, what happened?"

"My parents, both of them are fucking dead. Look just give me the things and I'll pay you."

I said as I was pulling out my wallet but Ian pushed it towards me,

"It's good, you don't have to pay."

I nodded and he went back inside to get my stuff, he came back outside and gave me a brown bag with coke, molly and Xanax in it.

I thanked him and skated back to my house, my mind was spiraling in questions that I couldn't even keep track of. It was making me sick, I got to my house and put my things down before I pulled out the little baggie of coke.

I made three lines of it with an old business card before I rolled up a dollar bill and snorted a line, after the first one things were feeling better already. I snorted the second one and I felt fucking great, I left the third one on the table and instead popped a molly and a Xanax.