Ace ✔️

Alone

The rest of the car ride is silent as Ace drives us back home from the hospital. In my hands were the discharge papers with copies of my test results. I didn't want to look down at them. I felt scared of them. Like they were poison and if I looked at them for too long, I would get this poison. It would harm me. But the truth is, I already had this poison in my body. All over my body.

Therefore, I shouldn't have this fear, because I am the poison.

How could someone be carrying both poison and healthiness in their body at the same time? My baby girl... my pure and healthy baby girl, being carried in my poisonous, toxic body.

But yet it doesn't feel like poison...

I'm snapped out of my thoughts when Ace parks the car. Assuming we were home, I was pretty much wrong. We were in front of the paint store...

I remember him promising back at the hospital that we would stop by the hardware store to get the paint for the nursery.

I look over at Ace, who was just looking ahead. Still lost. I open my car door and head towards the store as he follows me.

Walking in, we are welcomed with the cool AC breeze in the store. We are greeted by a worker as we walk over to the wall that had paint samples. Looking at the pastel colours, I come across the baby pinks. I feel the tears start to pool around my eyes again as I looked down at these colour samples. What had just happened today?

"Is there anything I can help you with?" a lady wearing an apron with a bunch of dried paint on it asks as we turn to face her

I clear my throat and blink away my tears

"Hi, we're looking for a light pink colour, uhm something for the nursery walls" I say pointing at the samples I was holding

"Oh congratulations! This must be so exciting for you two!" she starts to say

I try to give her a small smile, and I turn to Ace who was dazed out, looking at the ground.

"Well for a nursery, I would recommend this shade, it will really brighten a room and the pink isn't too strong" she says pointing to a sample

Nodding my head, I don't even bother looking at the colour properly

"That will do, thank you" I say

"Alright I'll get this mixed for you right now" she says with a smile

I let out a breath as we wait for her to finish mixing the paint. Leaning against the wall, I felt exhausted, mentally and physically. Ace hadn't said one word since the hospital, he was just mute.

This wasn't how I exactly imagined picking out the paint for the baby's room. I thought it would be more of a joyous occasion but all our energy was drained out at the moment.

Once the lady finishes mixing our paint, Ace picks up a few paint rollers and brushes. We pay for the materials and he carries them to the car.

I lean my head against the car window as he drove us home. Pulling up at the mansion doors, he parks the car.