WHY

Escape

WARNING: ****TALKS OF DEPRESSION, DEATH AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT. SELF- HARM (ACCIDENTAL), REALLY ANGSTY AND DEEP ABOUT FATHER LEAVING FAMILY****

Y/N: Your Friend

Y/B/N: Your Brother Name

Y/M/N: Your Mother Name & Your Middle Name

Y/A/N: Your Aunt Name

Sometimes you just wanted to escape the life you were born in, the situation that was given to you. But you couldn't no matter how hard you tried, the thing is you knew if you tried to escape this time, it would be permanent and it would damage everybody in the aftermath. But you didn't care, it was too much to care, too much to feel, in Hannah Baker words, you wanted the pain to stop and not exist.

Waking up the next morning was difficult, you stood in front of the mirror and sometimes it was like a vivid freaky ptsd, sometimes if you could, you would look at the bathtub in the corner of your eye and you could see how the scene unfold. You could see yourself laying in the bathtub, cutting yourself, you blacking in & out and seeing Jensen or Danneel or whoever running towards you trying to stop you from dying. You decided to start off your day by learning some new songs on your guitar, as you sat down and play the guitar, you heard a voice calling out for you, turning around you saw your uncle Jared coming up to greet you.

JP: "How's my sweet niece from my brother first marriage?"

Y/N: "I'm your only niece from the first marriage."
You said laughing and continue playing your guitar, Jared noticed that you weren't looking at him fully and it was bothering him.

JP: "What are you playing?"

Y/N: "Just some song"

JP: "I never knew you played the guitar, you never told"

Y/N: "I picked it up after you cut off all ties with my family.
You said as you continued to play the guitar, not bothering to look at Jared. He couldn't help but notice how much you love music, and how you had this look of pure concentration when you played or sang, Jared wondered if you ever would consider to go pro or pick up acting.

JP: "You know, you look just like him, your dad I mean, I know you look like your mom more, but you have this look your dad has and..."
Jared heard you play the wrong string, and he couldn't help but notice your face changed when he mentioned Jensen as your dad, he couldn't help but feel like it was a trigger for you when he mentioned Jensen.

Y/N: "Would everybody stop calling him my dad?" "He's not my dad." "A dad doesn't abandon you, I mean his children to start a new family with another women, doesn't bother to keep in touch with you, doesn't call you a disappointment or wish you never came and doesn't even bother to fight for you." "HE'S NOT MY FATHER." "HE WILL NEVER BE." "HE LOST THAT RIGHT WHEN HE ABANDON MY BROTHER AND I." "WHEN HE STOPPED FIGHTING FOR US WHEN MY MOM DIED."

Jared bit his tongue when it came to you talking about your dad, but this time he didn't know if pushing you might ruin his relationship with you, it took months of texting and failed video calls to get to where the both of you were at. He followed you downstairs to the kitchen, and saw you got out the ingredients for a smoothie, as you threw the ingredients in the blender, he missed your reaction when he brought up your suicide attempt.

JP: "I think we should talk about your suicide attempt"

Y/N: "Would everybody stop calling it that?"

JP: "What would you call it then, when you laid in the bathtub, high as a kite, slit your wrists and..."
Before Jared could continue, he heard you scream, looking up he saw your hand bleeding and you were shaking, he couldn't help but wonder if this was your attempt to get him to stop talking about the suicide or your dad or was it truly an accident.