For the first time in five years they were left alone in complete and utter silence. Every step he took seemed to echo, every breath that briefly left his lips seemed so loud. It was a weird feeling to be alone again; not uncomfortable, but unusual. For a moment Hongjoong missed the yelling from upstairs, the constant noise coming from any corner of the house. It wasn't rare that he was caught in complete and utter silence, but this one didn't held a promise of worries that would get over his head. This one scared him just a little more.
"... I'm craving cheesecake," the elder called into the silence and tipped his lips, catching all the attention. Seonghwa put his hands on his hips, face relaxed and calm.
His overall aura felt so warm, so comforting that Hongjoong felt his shoulders relax. He needed this, he really did and it was time to get through with it again. He nodded, turning on his heels to grab the keys he just had put into the little bowl on the commode. "Okay let's-"
"No..." Seonghwa took a hold of his husband's shoulder and pulled him back, smiling wide now. "I want to bake it. Yeah, let's bake one."
"The kitchen will get dirty...?" Hongjoong commented unsure and surprised. Of course Seonghwa loved to bake and cook, use his beloved kitchen that cost Hongjoong his head, but there was a golden rule: don't use my kitchen. The fact that Seonghwa was dragging him into the kitchen quite committed to his idea, just made him wonder.
"And? We can clean it afterwards," he replied and stood in the middle of the kitchen, hands back at his hips.
"Say, are you sick? Do you have a fever? Come, let me check-" Hongjoong put his hands around Seonghwa's head and brought his forehead to his lips, looking for high temperature which wasn't there at all.
"Hey- just because I want to do something with you, doesn't mean I'm sick-" the elder complained and stood tall again. He turned to the counter and opened drawers, pulling out bowls in different sizes. "Tsk, then go wherever if you don't want to-"
"That's not what I said-" a wide smile spread on Hongjoong's face. It felt so good to smile this honestly, with all his heart. Of course, it was just a small gesture, yet it felt so big. The wonders cheesecake could do. With a now quite light heart the younger crept up behind his husband and snaked his arms around his torso, burying his nose between the dip of his shoulders. "I can be emotional support while you make it?" he giggled into the elder's back.
"Mhm of course, let the work be mine," Seonghwa rolled his eyes and motioned to the freezer with his brows. "There, I'm sure I have frozen berries from summer."
"Mhm! Whatever you ask for, chef!"
"For what was that?"
"shh- I'm trying to make it authentic."
"I don't think-"
"Shush-"
~
Seonghwa had to stifle a giggle as he watched Hongjoong wait for the cake to bake in the oven. Like his kids used to, he squated in front of it and just watched it, though there was nothing happening his eyes looked so amazed. "Hwa... Can I lick the bowl?"
"You're going to get stomachache, Hongjoong come on."
"Please... Just the spoon-"
The elder looked down at his husband sitting on the floor watching him with pleading eyes. With a huff he grabbed the bowl and gave it to him, but the eye roll couldn't be prevented. Sometimes he was a child, sometimes he was strenuous to work with. But how could he say no?
"don't look at me like that..." Hongjoong whined and licked off his index finger, "just because I'm almost mid-thirty doesn't mean I have to act like that," he reasoned and stood up from the floor, gathered the used dishes to put them away into the dishwasher. "Look, I'm responsible."
"Oh wow, you put the dishes away," Seonghwa cheered overdramatically and chuckled. "You know who also puts the dishes away? My kids since they were four-" he said, just to tease the younger a little. As a response to the unfazed face of Hongjoong, the elder laughed and went in for a hug. "Joking, joking. Wooyoung did it when he was five-"
"You're just mean"
"I may be"
~
By the time the cake and dinner was eaten, sun slowly sunk and dissappear behind the horizon. A comfortable silence reigned inside the bathroom, next to the heavy smell of lavender and rose scented candles.
"Did the kids call?"
Seonghwa shook his head as he put away his phone, setting it on the floor carefully. "they arrived just a couple hours ago, Chaewon texted me. They are probably eating and making the beds right now. Let's call and check in later."
Hongjoong nodded, sinking deeper into the warm water of the bathtub. "my limps hurt" he groaned as he felt every little knot in his muscles dissolve. "can't believe how I survived this long without this here"
"you could have just filled the tub-"
"it doesn't have the same vibe alone, okay?" the younger reasoned and extended his arms at the elder sitting across from him. He smiled when Seonghwa rolled his eyes but still found his place in his arms. "I missed you so much."
"I've been back for half a year, Hongjoong," the elder replied and held onto the arm around his waist. His head rested on the younger's chest, his ears listening to the calming beating just right under.
"I haven't held you like this in forever," he gave back and placed a kiss on the elder's forehead. "... Haven't had you on me like this, completely calm and just for me to see," Hongjoong whispered just next to his husband's ear, planting a second kiss just right under. He had this to himself; playing away from the actual topic with little gestures, caresses and kisses. Yes, Hongjoong would gladly admit to himself that he'd rather drown right there then crush the atmosphere with his selfish inner fights. It had become so rare; the alone time he needed to function right. No, he wouldn't dare.
"I love you." Seonghwa slid up just a little higher so that he could put his head on the younger's shoulder to see his face. It was a cute sight; cheeks tinted in a faint rosé. "and I wish so dearly that you wouldn't be so closed into yourself, Hongjoong... I'm here, have always been and will be, you know?"
"I'm sorry," the younger called and drifted his eyes away for a moment. "For loading everything on you because I can't hold it." Hongjoong tightened his grip around the elder's bare torso against his, fearing he would slip away and disappear.
Seonghwa lifted his hand, little beads of water rolled down his arm. "I love you, Hongjoong, I do love you whole... you're not the monster you think you are, love," the elder spoke carefully as his soft thumb gently brushed over the red cheek. "and I will never be tired of showing you that you're indeed the angel I have wished for, Hongjoong."
It was in that moment all heavy loads were lifted from Hongjoong's shoulders and his heart sunk at the pressure it had been enduring. The calm and loving expression on the lips of his love wasn't exactly a smile, not a frown either, but it drew him in close, made him seal the unspoken words in a kiss that tasted like his tears once again.
-
Pls don't touch me I'm soft-
Idk I'm craving hurt/comfort rn so here we go suffer with me
I have a test and an exam tomorrow, pray for me🥰✨
I just realized, my finals are in 5weeks.
I am indeed not ready for German high school or life🤡
I hope you're doing okay
Please stay healthy and safe!
-gulkurusubb
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YOU ARE READING
ateez family au
FanfictionBecause I am a sucker for these *updates at least twice a week *mentions of mpreg