Serendipitous

29.

The rest of the surviving FBI as well as the military found our group a few days after traveling for shelter when the farm went up in flames. They blinded folded us before taking us underground, where the cold narrow dirt walls were powered with lights using solar power tools from above and renewable energy sources.

The long dirt tunnels that took us so deeply underground led us to large hallways, it felt like we had been walking for days, they wouldn't tell us anything. I was terrified but I'm pretty sure all of us were, we finally reached a tall ladder, one of the tallest I've seen. Each of us had to climb up before poking our heads up to see that we were now in the biggest cave I've ever seen.

National Geographic's pictures of caves looked like a small ant hill compared to this place, but this cave had many rooms, it had lights, beds, and a large space where the sunlight shown in. They told us the sunlight came through the top, they told us this cave had once been a volcano decades ago. But now it's just a cave of many people trying to live life again.

Each of us chose our rooms, each of us was given baked bread, carrots freshly picked from the area of the cave they allowed gardening, and dried deer meat—When they have luck with hunting. However I didn't complain, I couldn't, this was more than we all could have asked for.
But the emptiness in my chest has been talking it's emotional toll on me for days.
My dad suddenly walks in my room while taking a seat on the bed beside me, turning to face him I see his eyes express deep sadness.

"Molly, you haven't eaten anything here in the last three days," He looks down sadly before continuing, "You're not the only one who loved him" I turn my gaze away from him before staring at the blank stone wall to my side.

"You and mom hated the idea of us being together. She stole something from us and I lost that on top of losing Shane, you expect me to want to eat anything?" My voice remains hushed while I keep my gaze on the wall.

"What your mom did was wrong, I'm not condoning it. But we're all worried about you" He adds, the lump in my throat grows as the seconds pass by. I don't want to talk about this anymore, I don't want to remember any of this but somehow I'm forced to. Every time I see my mom I remember what she did—Even though neither of us have spoken since the night of the farm. I'm reminded that I've lost a baby I could of had and I lost Shane.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore" My voice is barely audible but I know he's heard me, once I know he's out of earshot and I'm alone I lay down on the bed as a small sob leaves my lips.
Things weren't supposed to be like this, Shane and I were supposed to have this great like together because the two of us were going to make it work. We knew it wasn't always going to be sunshine because of the walkers but we made it work, we were happy which is more than I had really been in a long time.

"Do not let her out of your sight, I'm gonna go with Rick to find Lori and Carl. Do whatever it takes to keep her safe" He tells them with a serious expression, they nod while I frown with worry. Shane turns his eyes over to me while we look at each other from the down window of the car, he gently caresses my cheek making my breathing quicken. "I love you" He whispers, "Don't forget it. I'm gonna see you again"

The fresh sting of tears runs down my cheeks until I manage to cry myself to sleep. While the nightmares persist for weeks on end, I am growing more and more heartbroken as the days drone on. The nightmares are always the same, Shane and I are at the farm watching the sun go down from the field, we make love in his tent and he tells me that he loves me. Next we're in a field of zombies and the barn is on fire, I turn around and he's gone. Just vanished while I search the farm screaming for him, but he never comes, he never shows up. He's just gone.

"Molly, Molly, wake up" I'm shaken awake by Maggie, her eyes are full of worry.

"What happened?" I croak out, her green eyes are sad.