Mujer Desinteresada

Chapter 12

People were still staring at me so I had to force a smile. With my shaking hands, kinuha ko ang sulat sa bag.

"Maybe he's just joking, pupunta 'yon..." pang-aalo ni Margo ngunit hindi ako sumagot at marahang binuklat ang sinabing sulat.

I saw a familiar handwriting, my heart feels heavy as I read the first paragraph.

Hi Angel, how are you? I saw your message but I didn't know how to respond. Nahihiya ako... Sobra. Hindi man lang kita naprotektahan, wala man lang akong nagawa para ialis ka ro'n dahil naging mahina ako. Ulit.

Tears started to form in my eyes. He's so annoying! He always think so lowly of himself! Ilang beses ko bang sasabihin na hindi siya mahina?

Masyado akong naging kampanteng okay na ako so I stopped taking my medicines. I know, I lied... I'm sorry. Akala ko kasi normal na rin ako, na kagaya mo na ako. Na kaya ko na rin gawin 'yong mga bagay na ginagawa mo para sa akin. Gusto ko ring ipagtanggol ka sa mga nanakit sa 'yo, alagaan ka, damayan ka sa mga araw na malungkot ka't kailangan mo ng kausap. Pakiramdam ko kasi masyado ng sobra lahat ng ginawa mo sa akin. Lagi na lang ako ang iniisip mo.

You were always there for me everytime that I'm broke, you were always there to fix me. I always ask myself, do I really deserve you? Because you're just... You're too much for me.

Then I realized... It's not your duty to fix me and that's not what I want you to do for me. I want you to wait and trust me while I fix myself. Can we do that?

Remember what I told you on our wedding day? Na hindi kita iiwan kahit ano pa ang dahilan, kahit ang sakit ko pa? Binabawi ko na.

Ayoko ng manatili sa tabi mo kung lagi na lang kitang inaabala at pinag-aalala. Pero bago ang lahat, gusto ko sanang ulitin 'yong mga narinig mo mula sa kanta. That song is for you, did you like it?

Through the years

You've never let me down

You turned my life around

The sweetest days I've found

I've found with you

Through the years

It's better every day

You've kissed my tears away

As long as it's okay

I'll stay with you

Through the years...

This part tells my feelings for you but unlike the last lyric, I will not stay.

Ramdam ko na ang paninikip ng dibdib ko sa bawat salitang nababasa. Ano bang sinasabi niya?  I tried calling him but his phone was off. Nag-alalang nakatingin lang sa akin ang mga kaibigan.