Until Your Last Breath (Troyler)

Chapter Ten

Troye POV

I studied my reflection in the mirror, staring at the black clothes I stood in. Tyler had died a week ago. In that time, I stayed at Zoe and Alfie's for another week before boarding a plane to Michigan for Tyler's funeral. I didn't want to fly back home; I didn’t think I would be able to cope with being along so I sought comfort and company from my friends.  

I turned and looked out the window, observing the weather to try and get Tyler off my mind. The sky was dark and cloudy, snowflakes falling slowly from above. It was chilly, although I welcomed the November weather in Michigan, wanting a difference from the hot Australian sun. My heart sank when I realised Tyler wasn't alive for Christmas, his favourite time of the year. I smiled fondly as memories of spending Christmas with Tyler flooded through my mind, making me feel all fuzzy inside since he died. 

Alfie, Zoe and I drove to the cemetery with Jackie. Zoe and Alfie were still inside the house, leaving Jackie and me in the car in silence. Ignoring how awkward it was, I was thankful for the heater, my body warming as it absorbed the heat. I wasn't sure if I was happy when Jackie finally spoke up, although the noiseless air was uncomfortable, I really wasn't in the mood to talk about him, knowing instantly she was going to talk about Tyler.

"Thank you Troye." The short statement caught me off guard. Her voice was filled was sincerity, the words completely genuine.

"Why?" 

I wanted to slap myself when I realised how dumb my tone of voice sounded. 

She took a moment to construct her reply, “Because you made Tyler the happiest I've seen him." I just smiled sadly in response, looking down at my black shoes. That was the only conversation we had in her car, the awkward silence quickly returning as we waited for Zoe and Alfie. As much as I loved Jackie, I found myself wishing they could hurry up. I had a small tinge of jealousy when the couple finally came running out of the house, hands entwined as the snow fell.

Zoe looked beautiful, her black dress flowing as she ran with Alfie who wore his black jeans and a black shirt. They were the perfect couple really, two stunning, smart and kind people, not to mention straight. They were the type of couple that everyone envied, you could tell by how they spoke and looked at each other that they were deeply in love. 

The silence never left as we drove to the local cemetery, each of us starting solemnly out the windows as the land outside flew past. I had suggested that Tyler be buried here as I figured that he would want to be buried in his hometown. 

As we drove into the carpark I could see many of our YouTube friends. I was happy to see them but I then remembered the reason why we were here. I sighed, blinking away tears as I opened the door of the car. Alfie put an arm around me in a comforting manner, his other hand still holding Zoe's. 

Hannah, Marcus and Korey greeted us. The mood of air was solemn, the very opposite of what it felt like when we were all together. I felt bad for Korey, knowing he had known Tyler for the longest. He had bags under his eyes and tear tracks down his cheeks. I was overcome with guilt when I remembered how Korey couldn't see Tyler in the hospital when we were in the UK, I felt like he deserved to see him and I didn't, it was my fault he died.  

We exchanged hugs, all of us starting to sob again. Korey was the most distraught, his face in his hands, body shaking with the force of his cries. I instantly wrapped my arms around him, his body tensing slightly at my contact but quickly relaxing. 

"T-this is co-omplete sh-shit." He whispered, shaking his head as his tears dampened my black sweater.  

"I kn-ow Sn-norey" I choked on my words, hugging him tighter for a second before letting go, glancing around at our friends. Niomi had joined Marcus, his arm around her and Zoe's head was buried in Alfie's chest. Mamrie and Grace were standing with Hannah, all of us crying.