Shape Unsheltered

PROLOGUE

Cindy Washington

Life can be one enormous roller coaster. One moment you're on top, that's the high. But the next time you are at the very bottom, that's the low. Other times you're in full motion and in for one hell of a ride.

The decisions I've made and the experience gained through the perilous path I chose; the highs and lows have shaped my world.

It all revolves around the decisions we make. If we make good choices we yield good results, but if we take the opposite route we will surely pay the consequence. Some may understand my actions but others may not, in the end, they are my thoughts in action.

I've made some decisions that I'm not proud of and for the rest of my life, I have to live with them. Most of my miss-giving wasn't to hurt those around me, but in the end, they were misinterpreted and I became hated for it.

I had so many plans for my life. I envisioned travelling the world, visiting various countries living a beautiful, spontaneous life. I envisioned success as a manager and chief editor of my own company and dominating the industry. I intend to sore like an eagle, being better than the best in the business.

It all changed when I got married to Sean Britto at age twenty-one and my vision collapse. I'm not saying my ex-husband is responsible for any of this. I'm saying the decisions I've made changed everything and my life was shaped unsheltered.

When we first met, I didn't feel a spiritual or physical connection to him but he is a very handsome man and slowly he grew on me, with his perseverance and charms. He was so persistent, he didn't give up and eventually, I fell in love with him.

Things were great, he loved me treated me like a queen. There isn't a bad thing I could say about Sean. He's genuine, smart, handsome, has the best stamina I ever had in a man. The qualities I admired more about him are that he worked hard and never gives up on anyone.

He made sure I had all I needed to survive and also he took care of my parents. He was very family-oriented and a great father, everything was good until it wasn't good enough. I have retained some of the best memories that I will cherish in my heart forever and ever.

I am very grateful for the life he afforded me but his demand to expand our family shattered me and I eventually lose myself. I was his shadow, whatever he wanted, whenever he needed it, at the end it became suffocating and I was drowning in it all. I was no longer Cindy Washington, I became Mrs Britto.

For years I tried to keep myself together but before I knew it time passed me by and I became frozen. I tried to hold on to what we had, amid that battle I became the fight and no longer the fighter. I lived and breathed Sean, I represented him at every business meeting, dinner, lunches, and breakfast, and my presence please his associates.

I became doubtful of myself and couldn't continue the charade any longer, some may find my actions distasteful they may call me all manner of names, they may even say I'm not contented but I'm the one navigating the jagged edges of my life.

Some might even question what I wanted if I had it all, but I needed fulfilment. I crave success, to find my path, to beat the odds. I didn't see my purpose in his life any longer. I needed to fulfil my dreams. I needed my moment in time, where I can be more than I thought I can be. My moon and stars are still to be reached.

Being the Stepford wife, being all submissive and docile wasn't the big picture for me. Why cage an eagle when it is born to sore. I was trapped inside, boxed into a reality that wasn't my own. I couldn't give the best of me, I needed to get away to break free. I live to be, the very best, I want it all and I'm not settling for less.