Raise a Glass to Freedom

Chapter 9

Trigger Warning: Self Harm

John POV

Why is Peggy suck a bitch? If I don't wanna tell people I don't have to! Why did she have to bring it up in front of Alex? I'm happy with him and she should be happy that he makes me happy. Oh and of course she brigs my dad into it. He's fucking abusive too! She's supposed to be my best friend but I hate her. She should just mind her own business.

Now Alex probably hates me too cuz I yelled at him. Ugh This is all Peggy's fault. If she could have just kept her mouth shut none of this would have ever happened. But then again I guess It's my fault too. I mean I told her about Jefferson. I hate this. I just wanna die, everything's stupid and pointless. Why can't something go right for just once? Why can't I do something for me with out consequences for once? It's not fucking fair I just wanna be happy for once!

I walk over to my draw and take out my knife. I haven't used it in about 2 weeks but fuck it. I roll up my sleave and see the Scar from where Thomas cut me. It's still there but it's faded  bit so I go over it again the knife, making it bleed a lot. I wince a little at the pain but I ignore it. I sit down and start cutting my thighs. It hurts, but I deserve this. I deserve this pain. I'm not worth being happy.

Peggy POV

Why is he mad at me? I'm just trying to help so he doesn't get beaten up. I know for sure he didn't break up with Thomas so that means he's cheating on him and as much as I ship John and Alex if Thomas finds out then he'll kill John. And what Happens if Alex finds out John's still with Thomas? He'll beak up with John and John will be even more depressed.

What I really don't understand is why he got so upset when I mentioned his dad. His dad has always been so nice to me. Me and John have been best friends since we were kids cuz our dads worked together. Angelica and Eliza weren't as close to him as I was. Ha, we even dated for like 6 months at one point in high school cuz people thought we were gay and we didn't wanna come out anyways John's dad was always really nice to me and me and John have literally never had a fight so why the fuck is he so mad now.

Eliza walks into my room and sits next to me. "Are you ok?" she asks. I shake my head. "I know you and John have been friends for ages but you'll get through this. I dunno what any of it was about but it can't be that big of a deal, he'll talk to you again soon" She assures me.

"I don't even know why he's mad...." I reply. She hugs me "He's cheating on Alex...."

"What? With who?" She asks confused.

"With Jefferson, He didn't break up with him so now he's with both Jefferson and Alex and that's probably why he didn't want anyone else to know" I explain.

"Omg that bitch! Why the fuck would he do that?! I thought he was nice" She exclaims. "I'm gonna go talk to him." She gets up and walks out before I can stop her. Well shit. Now John's gonna hate me even more. He's never been mad at me and now he's never gonna talk to me again.

Alex POV

Its been about 15 minutes, so I decide to go check on John again. I walk over and knock on his door. He doesnt reply so I just open the door. I see him asleep on his bed. I smile a little, he looks so peaceful. I look around and see a knife in an open door. Why does he have a knife in his room? Maybe he left it in here by accident. I take the knife out to the kitchen the walk back to his room.

I sit at the end of his bed and finish his essay for him. About 5 minutes later Eliza Barges in. "John what the fuck?!" She yells, waking up John. He looks at me then at her. "Peggy told me!"

"SHE WHAT?!" He yells with fear in his eyes. Eliza just nods. "I swear imma kill her" He gets up and runs out. I look at Eliza.

"Im so sorry Alex, you deserve better than him" She sighs and sits next to me. What does she mean? John didnt do anything. I guess she could tell I was confused cuz she hugs me and says "Hes cheating on you"

"W-What? No, hes not John wouldnt cheat on me. Hes better than that and he wouldnt wanna hurt me"

"Alex, why do you think he didnt want anyone else to know? Hes still with Thomas" She replies. "He told Peggy and Peggy told me, Im so sorry." Why would he do that do me? I cant believe I trusted him! I delete all the work I did for him then walk back into my room and slam the door.

I lay on my bed. I fucking loved him! Why does he even like Thomas? Actually it makes sense, Theyre both assholes. I can't believe John would do this! Ugh I can't believe I thought he cared about me! I wonder if Jefferson knows. I'm gonna go tell him. I walk out of my room and into Jefferson's. "Why are you in my room?" He asks.

"Cuz I thought you should know John was cheating on you. With me. So I would dump his ass if I were you, that's what I did" I reply.

"I'll deal with it how I want, now you can get out" He spits. I roll my eyes and walk out, ugh he's the worst. Like I said he and John are perfect together.

Word count: 1019