Once Again

Kabanata V |Memoirs|

"Zind's Point of View"

"Flashback"

Eversince i was in secondary, we moved from place to place and because of that I also moved to different schools, that is due to my father's job and some circumstances.

Really, it doesn't matter to me because i've always want to be alone anyway.

"People fakeness are the main reason why i like to be alone".

I have no friends since i don't want to and because i don't need to. I hate goodbyes so i just chose to not making it.

Not until i was transferred in your school and i met you. you always talked to me even though I didn't respond to you that much.

I was always sitting at the end nearing the window while playing my music on headphones in my ears. Then you sat beside me as you start ask me questions.

"Hi, I'm allira and i'm the president of our section, you're zind right? The transferee, nice meeting you zind."

Tinignan lang kita saglit at bumalik din ang tingin sa labas ng bintana.

"You also like music. I've also, particularly in bands." and you keep talking and talking. Lagi tayong parehas ng preferences kaya naman doon na nagumpisa ang lahat.

"Zind.. Do you already finished your assignment? if not, You can borrow my notebook." Bungad mo sakin kapag nakakahanap ka ng time na kausapin ako.

Sometimes i'm skipped going into school and you always saying i can borrow you're notes so that i maintain my grades.

"You're absent again, here borrow my notes. There's assignment in history and also we have project." You were always reminding me about school works.

"Allira do you like zind don't you?"Tanong ng kaklase natin na may halong makakalokong tingin.

"Nope". Kaswal mo lang sabi nang hindi nagpapatinag sa mga asar nila sayo.

They've already mistaken you for someone who likes me and aferwards almost our classmates teases us, yet still you didn't stop talking with me.

"Zind, Do you know this?" Lapit mo sa akin kahit alam mong aasarin nanaman tayo.

"Ayieee". Asar ng mga kaklase natin.

"Guys. Stop it" Kaswal mong sabi sa kanila at hindi na pinansin pa.

"Don't mind them, they've like that because i don't have any crush sa tagal ko ritong nag-aaral."

You're so considerate and genial because i just don't want to talk with others so you approach me to make you my friend.

"When sadness was the sea, you've taught me how to swim".

That one time, some guys pestering me, more like they're bullying me because i don't talk to much. You came and talk to me like they've not existed. It's your way to expel them and you've succeeded because they leave after .

In the first i just want to appreciate your intentions but not long after i decided that I've considered you already as my friend.

"Ok classmates as a president we have to do our best in this theatre play!"

You're so hardworking yet timid at the same time, always doing the best for our section is the one of the reason I've liked in you.

Without even realizing it, I've always looking, observing and even following you.

"Alli pinapapunta ka ng SSG member sa Room 2"

I did follow you. I always here looking at what were you doing.

"Bakit kulang yung budget? Sana kinunsulta niyo muna ako"

I want to comfort you when i see that scene but i chose not to. You were so dissapointed to yourself. You were so sad while going back with your friends.

"Bakit raw pinatawag ka?" tanong ng isa mong kaibigan.

"May tinanong lang" sabi mo nang di pinapahalata ang lungkot na nadarama mo.

I've always here for you but you're just too innocent that i have feelings for you. Even though i always revealing my concerns to you yet you always see that as a friend motives.

One time were at classmate house because of schoolworks and you've fallen asleep.

"Shhh pagod yan" sabi ng kaibigan mo nang gigisingin ka dapat ng isa nating kaklase.

Pagkaalis nila ay kaagad akong tumabi sayo.
I'm more like guardian to you, you've sleeping so soundly that i want to keep gazing at you.

There's also always like this time that you want to do all the works even though that is supposed not individual but a group.

"Tulungan na kita dyan" aya ko nang nakikita kong ginagawa mo na naman lahat kaysa magpatulong sa group members mo.

Lagi rin yung time na sapilitan ka pang papakainin ng mga kaibigan mo at nagpapaiwan ka dahil wala kang gana.

"You're torturing yourself to starve when the things you're doing still unfinished."

Lumapit ako sayo para di pilitin pakainin ka dahil alam kong di ka rin naman mapipilit.

"Hindi ka nanaman ba kakain?" Tanong ko ng tumabi sayo, as i predicted you're surprising as ever.

Mas pinili ko na ring hindi kumain at dinamayan ka.

Not long after that they've announced that we have a Night party and i did invite you as my partner but things got complicated as circumstances happen.

I couldn't say my goodbye to you that i had to leave right away.

My plan on confessing my feelings to you that time, did not came and some rumors spread even more that give me headache because I did not explain it to you.

"In the end i only regret the chances I didn't take." There's so many chances. how i wish i tell my feelings sooner.

I know you were mad and hated me because i left you before the night party. You have no partner that night. I know you were disappointed to me so i chose not to come back.

"The most paintful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained"

A/N: Hey you, Yes you are, I just want to say Thankyou for reading!:)