𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑟-𝑐𝑟𝑜𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑑 | a.s x fem!reader

34 - Deepest Condolences

"I'm sorry, what ?" Devica asked in disbelief, slowly rising from the mattress and traipsing slowly towards Anakin and me, a confused and bewildered expression pasted upon her face.

"Yeah, I'm not sure if I caught that correctly either (y/n); what?" Anakin chimed in annoyingly, making me dart an ever so quick look of irritation onto him before directing my gaze back onto my older sister, who had her eyes plastered upon Anakin, her left eyebrow slightly raised in bemusement.

"I said, come with us Devica. Leave Corellia forever and come home with me," I replied quickly, an uncomfortable lump formed in my throat as the heat in the room had miraculously risen, causing me to tense up my neck in discomfort due to the suffocating material which was my Jedi robes.

I had already lost Ayzel... I'm not planning on losing Devica too.

I notice Devica's eyes dart around to different places, not able to fixate on a singular spot, her eyebrows furrowing in stress from this overwhelming decision I had so abruptly placed on her shoulders. This must be a difficult choice for Devica; Corellia was her home albeit a slightly impoverished one at that. She's been here alone since she was all but 12 years of age - a youngling - fending for herself in this money-centric, industrial system. It made me thankful that she had met someone so wonderful as Xavian to stay by her side when she needed him.

That's it... Xavian. That's what's stumping her decision; she can't leave him behind. I mean, I understand her completely. Despite them not being romantically involved, that doesn't necessarily mean that he isn't her soulmate. Ahsoka has become almost like my own little sister, beside me through thick and thin ever since our first encounter in the training room. I wouldn't be able to leave her behind for anything, she is simply too valuable for me to lose... oh, and Anakin too.

I bit my lip anxiously as I watched Devica grow a little more skittish the longer the tense atmosphere in the room ensued. I noticed Anakin furrow his eyebrows in concern as he viewed my sister, watching her fingers tremble as she fiddled around hyper-anxiously with them. I sigh inaudibly and step towards her, taking her shaking hands in mine and caressing my thumb over her soft skin gently, bringing her chocolate brown eyes up to meet mine. Her hands immediately ceased to shake as I held them, and her chest began to even out in steady breaths as I guided her silently to help her come down from the cloud of anxiety currently shrouding her soul. I hate that I had unsettled her to this extent... was I being selfish asking her to come with me?

"I-I don't know what to say (y/n), really I don't. It's a beautiful offer but I... I don't know if I can just pick up. I have a life, a job, an employer who I can imagine to be very displeased if I disappeared.. and Xavian. He-he can't just leave either! He has a job too, this is his home and then there's Dax-" Devica spiralled, her voice quickening as she grew unsteady again.

"Devica, Dev... It's ok. You don't have to come with us; I get it. I know that Solaris must bring back a lot of unpleasant memories for you. It's just that if I leave you, I'm worried we'd never see each other again. And I've just lost Ayzel and only recently came into the knowledge that you even existed. You're my sister, Devica... I want to be able to get to know you but not if it's for a selfish cause, like forcing you to abandon your life here," I sighed in dismay, not being able to look into her eyes without the feeling of tears brimming in mine but forced a slight smile all the same.

How can we have only known each other for a mere amount of time... but I feel like she's been here my whole life. How can I have only just laid my eyes on her, and I already love her to death? She made me feel closer to my mother, and even my father and Ayzel. She made me feel like home.

You really need to work on your attachment issues.

Really? Now is not the time for inner conflict with the voice in your head, (y/n)-