Broken Clocks

The Accident

Beep beep beep beep beep

The hospital machine monitors go off as i stand next to a badly scarred Mnqobi. His face has grazes all over . The doctor said he sustained some injuries in his head and might ...i don't want to say it or think of it ...I'm never gonna forgive myself for this. I'm the reason he's laying in this bed .

I can't look at him like this i turn to look outside his window , his family will never forgive me for landing their son in hospital. Oh my god why did i have to go out that night ! Everything is ruined. Nelisa's hands gently rub me on the back as i stand with my feet vigorously tapping on the floor , the door springs open , Nomzamo and Ntombi storm in and run to their brother's aid.

"Oh kodwa Mnqobi , ngane ka ma what happened to abidding by the rules of the road" - Ntombi

Nomzamo walks to me as i wipe the tears on my cracked cheeks. She doesn't say anything but engulfs me in a warm hug and fresh tears immediately run down my face . We break away from the hug and she gives me a look that is full of empathy and hurt .

"Ncese ma , i know it all doesn't make sense right now bu- "

"It doesn't make sense njani when this one tried to kill our brother ! " - Ntombi

Nomzamo : Ntombi not now ! Stop it !

Ntombi : Stop it ? Nomzamo she tried to kill our brother after she realised that she's barren and couldn't do the simplest thing that a woman can ever do , bear him an heir now she's after his mone-

Nelisa : You gon catch these hands bitch ! Say shit about my best friend one more time , i double d dare you to say something!

"Nelisa !" i call her out as Ntombi interrupts " oh trust the floozie ongamazi nobaba wengane yakhe to step in and help the murderer-

Nelisa attempts to walk to the other side of the room to attack Ntombi but Nomzamo holds her back

"Both of you stop it! Ntombi you will stop it with your disgusting attitude towards Ndalo , Ndalo needs us right now and you two are just bickering over nonsense !" Nomzamo yells out as she charges towards Ntombi .

Nomzamo: Actually both of you get out

"Oh kodwa sisi what did i do?" - Ntombi

"Why do i have to get out ?" - Nelisa

"Ntombi noNelisa phumani ! "

Nelisa walks to me and gives me a hug , " I'm sorry , I'll give you a call later " she plants a peck on my cheek and walks out followed by a rather annoyed Ntombi.

As the two walk out of the room Nomzamo turns to me and gives me a swift brush on the shoulder , "Im sorry you had to witness all of that , how are you? Oh no don't even answer that you must be devastated. Don't worry he'll be okay , just put your faith in the Lord ,okay Ma and i and the rest of the family are here for you if you need anything okay?" She utters with the most sincere look on her face . I couldn't help but feel horrible , if they found out their son was here because of me , it would all change.

Ntombi was right , i killed their brother. A tear escaped , " okay you need to stop with the moping ,let's get you home  you need to rest " Nomzami says as i try to argue with her she brings her index finger up to my face , "no Ndalo, we won't go back and forth about this , you are going home and I'm coming with you. Mnqobi will be okay ,we'll come check in on him tomorrow. You know he wouldn't like to see you all tired and drained out like this , let's just go home okay it's late and it's past visitng hours asambe sthandwa sam...? "

I can't get words out of my mouth , i just nod and before we walk out , i give Mnqobi a peck on the forehead and we walk out of his room.

                            *****

As soon as we arrived home i climbed on the bed and drifted of.

Following morning i woke up with a terrible headache and called in sick at work , Nomzamo ran me a hot bath and i just soaked in the water until it went cold , my body felt heavy . Why was this happening to me ? What did i do to deserve this ? First it was Nkanyezi , now my husband ...i can't afford to lose him , not when i need him like this. To think now i had to put a hold on our wedding which was only a month away. "Lord please give me the strength " i said to myself as i dragged my body out of the tub , i got dressed in a tracksuit and went down to the kitchen.

Nomzamo was dishing up , she had made a big breakfast and i honestly had no appetite , but her efforts couldn't go to waste so i chunked in a few spoons of soft porridge here and there.

After breakfast we went to see Mnqobi and there was still no change, oh my poor husband , there were flowers on the bedside drawer sent by our friends all wishing him a speedy recovery. I sat next to him and thought of all the good times we had ,i should've cherished every moment with him. Both the good and the bad , our memories made us who we are today, they brought us this far and just like we got through it all we were also gonna get through this. I held his hand in my mine and kissed his palm , balled it up and placed it on his heart . "I'll always be here" i uttered out as Nomzamo walked in with Thabi who embraced me in a hug immediately.