Desire {Corpse fanfic}

{24} Normal

🎵 Joji - ATTENTION

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Corpse didn't sleep at all that night. Or at least not in the bed. Maya was expecting to wake up in the middle of the night when he comes in the room quietly as he usually does, but he never showed up.

She had almost forgot about what had happened last evening, but it all came back to her when she saw her backpack, laptop and papers on the floor by the bed. She came in the bedroom to study, because she just didn't want to look at him after that fight.

As mad as she was she knew that they have to resolve it one way or another, because living together like this was not an option. But all that resolving had to wait until the afternoon, because she just simply didn't have it in her to deal with it this early in the morning. Corpse probably didn't mind it either, especially if he really didn't sleep at all night.

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Maya was tense all day, couldn't stop thinking about how she probably made the wrong choice to move in with him. Having these arguments could really mess up her academic achievements. What a fucking stupid idea in the first place, to move in with a stranger you've met through a sugar baby website.

She dreaded going home, but she also just wanted to get it over with as fast as possible, so she caught the first bus after her last class and arrived at the flat at around 3 o'clock.

She was starteled to find Corpse on the kitchen floor in tears again. The whole situation was so identical to the last time she rushed to help him after receiving his texts, that only the broken cereal bowl was missing from his side.

Oh my god Corpse,
Why didn't you call me?

Left my phone in the office...

He sniffled. This time Maya knew exactly what to do so she rushed to the bathroom to get his meds. She kneeled down next to him, to help him take the pills, and she started massaging his hands and arms right away.

What happened?

It's pretty fucking obvious, isn't it?

I think you should go to the doctor.

Or phisical therapy.

This can't be normal.
For this to happen so often.

No.

You don't know what's normal for me.

You could never know.

His attitude felt like a slap in the face. Maya just wanted to help but all she got back from him was anger. But she knew, at least hoped, that it wasn't specifically targeted at her. Corpse was just going through a hard time, as anyone would be, after having to change his life so much because of letting a stranger move in with him, and after having several flare ups in a few weeks. 

You're right.

I will never know what it's like for you.

And I'm sorry, that you have to go through all this.

But I don't think that it has to be this bad.

What harm could going to the doctor do?

What harm?

Maybe someone recognizing me?

Someone taking a fucking picture of me and spreading it all over the internet?

Oh my god!

Is that really the reason for you to not get help?

Can't you see that that's a fucking irrational fear?!

Would you rather lose the ability to move?

It's none of your fucking business!

Fuck, I wish you weren't fucking here.

I never asked you to save me, I don't need saving,

I'm fucking fine!

Corpse wanted to rush out of the room and slam a door, but he still couldn't move. He just stared ahead and felt his hot tears rolling down on his cheeks. He couldn't look at Maya. He couldn't bear to see her so heartbroken.

Maya just looked at him while still kneeling at his side. She couldn't believe what she heard. She didn't want to say anything even if she could. She was tired of fighting, she wished that they could go back to how everything was on the first week. She wished she could go back to her old apartment, she wished she never met him, she wished she never came to the US.

She wished she could just disappear. But that's not how life works, so she chose the next best thing, and picked up her bag from the side of the front  door and just left. She didn't know where she was going, she just left.

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A.N.

Hi! How's everyone feeling?

I'm sorry for not posting for a while, I was visiting my family. I hope everyone's summer is going great!
<3