A Court of Shorts and Storys

Secrets Part 1: Struggle

So... This was going to be a short one with Elain and Lucien. And then I got carried away and now we are here... This one is me trying to learn to like Elain a bit more. 

A three part story 

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She walked alone in the Town house, back and forth, not sure what to do. She had been in the Town House alone for almost three weeks now, she hadn't talked to anyone in her family. Elain wasn't even sure they would talk to her if they knew. After all, she had shamed Nesta for her adventures with males. And Feyre... She would just be disappointed in her. Elain keep on walking, pacing up and down the stairs. Trying to figure out how to tell them, and how to tell him...

Lucien had been there, for three years they had tried, he had tried to court her, to come closer to her. And Elain, she had loved it. She had started to warm up to the idea of him being hers, to live with him. To move on... And that night; three weeks ago. She had given in, let go of all fae instinkts just to se how it could have been with her mate. And the sex... What ever she had with Graysen was nothing compared to what she had experienced that night. It had been amazing, and then... Lucien had whispered that one word. That word that scared her more then anything.

"Mate..." It had send her into pure panick. She had kicked him out in that moment, and refused to acknowledge his words on forgiveness. She had told Feyre to leave her alone in the house. And her sister had respected that. But then... in the first days after, she had notice it. The sent of the house had started to change, and it had come from her. Her scent had changed.

She wasn't on any tonic, and to her knowledge neither was Lucien, she knew that Fae children where rare, and had never even consider it a possibility. But it had happened, one damned night with the male who called her his mate, and she had no idea how to handel this.

Elain turned around, walking back up the stairs. She had once heard that too much walking could cause a loss, or maybe that was only for humans. Or just a superstition that kept the women at home. Elain didn't care, she had no idea if she wanted this or not. For when she had realised what that change of smell was, she had been happy until she reminded herself who the father was. Elain stoped in the stairs, holding on to the railing for her life. How could she have been the one who ended up like this? When Nesta was the one who had been screwing around. How was she the one who ended up alone, that was Feyres role in life.

Elain needed to tell someone, she needed to share har situation with someone. Not Azriel, not Mor, Not Armen. Not the half wraiths... Not Nesta... Maybe Feyre... But her sister would press on the fact that Lucien needed to know. And Elain wasn't sure she wanted that. Her rejection that night had been clear. She let a hand move down to her stomach, not that there was anything to feal or show. But just to seek som comfort. Maybe she could ask Rhys to take her to a secluded place, where she could have this child alone, far from everyone and everything, with just a garden to atend to. Maybe Rhys would keep her secret from everyone. Maybe she could ask for a bargain from him to ensure that... Elain sat down in the stairs. Yes, that was a plan. She just needed to call him here. And make sure no-one saw her, or felt her scent. She needed to disappear, and Rhys was her way out.

Elain plan did not go as planed, for just moments after she was done with it, a giggling Nesta and Cassian opened the door, laughing loudly as it slammed behind them. Elain froze, and hoped that the two of them was to catch up in each other to notice her changed smell. But the pair came up the sataris, finding her there. Elain looked down as Cassian's eyes widened. The two of them stoped what ever they had planed.

"Cass.. Go out and fly over the city." Nesta said. And sat down besides Elain. "And ask Rhys for a healer to be sent here. If he asked. I am the one who needs one after what we just did." Elain looked up at her sister, marveling over the fact that Nesta was willing to lie to the High Lord. Cassian didn't say a word as he left. Nesta took Elains hands, holding them in a firm gripp.
"You can tell me how mutch or how little you want. I just need to know if it was consensual when it happened." Her words took Elain back to that night.