Prologue

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"Ang unfair mo naman,"

His broke voice made me weak. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot sa sinabi niya. Para akong namanhid sa sakit na nararamdaman ko.

"I always dream a life with  you but....you want a life with yourself?, " Yumuko siya at pinahiran ang luha sa kaniyang mata.

My man is crying and it's too painful to think that i am the reason behind it.

"Why are you so selfish, baby?, "

Pinilit kong h'wag umiyak dahil sa nakikita at naririnig ko mula sa kaniya.

Sa bawat pag buka ng labi niya ay parang kutsilyo na tumatarak sa loob ko ng paulit-ulit... Bumabaon.

A shed of tears form on his eyes when our eyes met.

The pain i am causing him is not bearable anymore. I can see it on the eyes of the man i love. The man who made me feel the euphoric of love.

Ngayon ko nagpagtanto kung gaano ako kasamang tao. I made this man cry because of being selfish!

"Who am i to stop you from chosing yourself?, " He laugh without humor.

Another tears fell from his eyes but he immediately wiped it. Like, he doesn't want me to see it.

" It's your life after all,"  Kahit na gano'n ay hindi ko nahimigan ng galit at pangungutya ang kaniyang salita.

One of the reason why i fall for him is that. He never make me feel dumb about deciding what can make me happy. He's always been supportive with what i want, even hurting and leaving him.

Would love really conquer all?

"A-Are y-you,.." He swallowed hard and composed himself. He wiped his tears and stood up.

Maigi kung sinuri ang ginawa niya. Nakatitig lang ako sa mga mata niya. Mugto ang mga ito at sobrang pula.

Sinuri ko ang bawat parte ng kaniyang mukha. If it's really the last time that i will see him. Then, i will be brave enough to memorize every bit of him. I am willingly bear all the pain just to see him one last time.

This is the man i want to live my life with but this is also the man who will ruin my dream if i continue it.

"Are you happy with it? Your decision?." Ang pag taas at pag baba ng kaniyang lalamunan ay nakita ko. Ang tensyon at pag pipigil niya ay alam ko.

I know him well and i must say. He's in pain and it's because of me.

He's hesitant on my decision but i already chose the path i want to take.

"I am.. " Buo ang boses kong sinabi 'yon sa kabila ng lahat ng nararamdaman ko.

I want him to stay but i don't want him to break me. I need to learn the meaning of my boundaries.

Today, i chose again myself. Which I always do. Before, i just chose myself and don't regret any and don't feel conscience whom i hurt. But now that it's him... It hits different.

"I guess... I'll stop right here." He smiled.

Nagkatitigan kami ng matagal pero bago bumagsak ang mga luha niya ay umiwas 'tong muli.

How genuine your love is despite everything that i did.

"I hope you achieve the dream you always prayed for, baby. " He uttered, surely... bravely.

"Remember that you can alway count on me. "  I bit my lips while listening to him.

" See you around, Doc?" He exclaimed that stunned me. My eyes widened because of it. I want to suppress the urge to look at him dahil kilala ko ang sarili ko. Alam kong tatakbo ako pabalik sa kaniya at 'yon ang pinaka mahirap sa lahat.

Siya ang pahinga ko--ang sandalan ko at ang kakampi ko sa magulong mundo. I chose to let him go because i want to see myself as a successful woman in the future.

I use to not work in a relationship because i know it will be a distraction but when i met him. The table turns out well but sadly, it's not compatible.

He's too good... truly

"I love you.. "He said softly before closing the door.

At that moment, i want to buried myself.

How could i hurt someone like him! How could me! How dare me!

It's done! The chapter of our love story are now on its epilogue.

What a cruel world it is!

"Don't settle for less, Darling," Nag alab ang apoy sa loob ko nang sinabi ni mommy 'yon.

I've never felt angry on them before and i used to believe that quote.

This is want they want. They choose the path I should walk in. They ruled my life. For 22 fucking years! I wanted to go out!

I felt betrayed because i can't feel any love at all. I'm like a prisoner on my own family!

I didn't know that she's here. Hindi ko man lang napansin ang pagsunod niya sa'kin kanina or maybe I'm just to occupied to think about it.

"Chase your dream and not those people, " She sounds, disgusted. " Who don't deserve it... "

Anger invaded me quickly.

"He deserve the chase, " Lakas loob kong sagot.

This time, i want to choose myself over them. This time, i will fight for my own happiness. It's a risk but I know it will be worth it because Axel worth everything to me.

Desidido na ako sa desisyon ko ngayon. No matter what happened, I'll stick to that kahit madalian lang ito. I want to choose what i want. I want to choose my happiness.

"He's not, Darling.. Look at this. " Tinapon niya sa harap ko ang isang envelope na may lamang mga picture.

Nakita ko ang isang lalaki na naka ngiti habang nakatingin sa babaeng nasa harap nito. The other pictures' shocked me.. They're kissing! At first malabo pa ang itshura ng mga ito dahil sa mga luha ko pero nang napahid ko 'yon ay para akong nanghina. Natigilan ako. Parang gusto ko nalang isipin na panaginip ang lahat at hindi 'to totoo. Nanginginig kong inabot ang ilan pang mga litrato.

No! These isn't true! Edited ang lahat ng ito!

"Who deserve the chase?, "  Mapang-uyam na sabi ni mommy. She's like proving me a point na ayaw ko namang paniwalaan.

Pero tangna! Ito na, oh! Andito na sa harapan ko!

May parte sa'kin na hindi naniniwala pero parang niloloko ko lang din ang sarili ko.

Fuck! I'm not a fool to believe all of this but, i'm not an ass to make myself believe even the evidence are waving infront of me.

"Wag mong kulungin ang sarili mo sa mga pansamantalang tao. Spread your wings to your future, Darling... Not to people who's not deserving." Huling aniya bago siya umalis.

Nanatili akong nakatingin sa picture dahil hindi ako makapaniwala!

Axel is kissing a girl!

A fucking girl!

They look happy with each other and as far as I remember. This is the day when i said yes to him!

Halos matawa ako sa realisasyon na 'yon.

Is this a Joke?

If it is.. please be... because i don't know what to do anymore.

F-ck it!

He cheated on me!

........................,.......................................

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