Weekdays. Weekends. That's life. Weeks. Months. Years. Decades. Next thing you know *poof* you're not tolerated on planet earth anymore, but the damn dolphins are. Let's face it, I make a logical point. It's quite casua- *resists making a pun, but miserably fails* lly cruel. YES * puts hands up in surrender* I'M LISTENING TO 'MR. PERFECTLY FINE' RIGHT NOW.... and yes, I listen to it every day. I can assure you I'm doing fine, perfectly fine-
Dammit. I did it again. *mumble* I can't help myself.
And I did again *cough* Hey Stephen *cough* Let's move on please.
Monday: OoOoOoOoh, yOu'Re bLiNdEd bY tHe LiGhTs- but quite frankly, your teachers don't care. Get the hell out of bed. Le gAsP! Barely 4:30 am? You overslept again. Hurry you fool! Shower, get dressed, brush your hair and teeth, eat breakfast (preferably bagels and a cup of caffeine ). Don't forget to to last minute complete your history project about *whatever you're learning in social studies*. Next, rush after the school bus before it takes off-
Well, shit.
You just missed it.
Pros: Is there really anything good about Monday?
Cons: Everything.
Tuesday: Save your tears for another day suckers. It's only Tuesday.
Pros: tAcOs 🌮
Cons: It's tue much of a day
Wednesday: As my 8th grade science always reminded every Wednesday ❝ WED-NES-DAY, not Wedesday ❞ because us 8th graders can't spell.
Pros: At least it's not a Monday or a Tuesday
Cons: It's the middle of the furry cat week. From my own experience, Wednesdays are the longest.
Bonus Pros: A Wednesday in a café
Thursday: Still not Friday *frustration*
Pros: Thursday isn't too bad
Cons: I can lie, say I like it like that. Thursday isn't too good.
Friday: Come on losers, it's finally Friday. Get in the abstract van and get ready to party- or get rammed off the road. Either way, fUN.
Pros: The weekend is near and you can stay up as late as you want to!
Cons: You'll tend to miss your rl friends ( or at least I did )
Bonus Pros: Online friends exist *happy noises*
Saturday: A.k.a. #teamroadtrip day. Where are we going this time HN gang? The only thing I ask is that we don't bring James this time. He's a tolerated idiot.
Pros: The only day of the week when you get to oversleep and freely stay up as late as 3 am.
Cons: You may bury a friend
Sunday: You can either mourn or partay like it's 1989. Your choice.
Pros: Honestly, e v e r y t h i n g
Cons: Sunday eventually has to come to an end, and soon it'll be Monday. Nothing lasts forever and we'll be forced to watch it begin again.
....
Yes, I wrote this on a Monday, which is why it's the only one that's long and specific ( I don't even attend school in person and won't until August, but.... I have to say it.... remember it all too well. I couldn't resist-)
For those of you who own no calendar or are just too lazy to check your phone lockscreen, today is a Tuesday; June the 7th of the year 2021. Despite living a still lockdown life, I always know the day. So if you ever don't know the day, ask me. However I live in America and my state *shakes head in severe discontent* is majorly behind in timings, so it may already be the next day when it's evening for me.
A reminder to not save your tacos for another day. They'll be spoiled by then.
YOU ARE READING
𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚎𝚗𝚜𝚎 𝚟𝚒𝚒𝚒
HumorDespite what the title miserably fails to persuade you, I can assure you this is not humorous. Just nonsense. However, I'm not one to judge *glare* oh wait- I'm writing this book so I c a n Enjoy reading this garbage!! Don't forget to read Volu...