Fifty Ways to Love You - Emily Prentiss x OC

8. almost

"JJ!" My loud voice shocked her over the phone. I was just sitting in traffic on my way to work, finally alone.

"God, hi, Galina, what's up? Why are you yelling?" she asked with a laugh.

"So...so I..." I was so overwhelmed I could hardly form a sentence. "Last night I was kind of freaking out and I called Spencer but his mom was having an episode so he couldn't come over and he called Emily so she came over and ended up sleeping on my couch and we got coffee on the way to her place and I watched her put on makeup and— so when I came out dressed she was kinda stuttering and said I looked nice and then the same thing happened when I saw her after she put on makeup and looked at me and she said 'Now you know how I felt this morning' and I don't know what she means!"

I took in a massive breath. I'd hardly stopped to breath while I told her.

"Okay, first of all, Lina, calm the hell down," she laughed. I panted and chuckled. "Okay? Better? Now, I have no idea what that could mean. You're a profiler,"

"So are you!"

"But I wasn't there," replied JJ. "What do you think?"

"I don't know! I'm too close to the situation!" I exclaimed.

"Okay, then watch her behavior today at work. See how she acts." Where would I be without my level-headed mom friend? "Hey, uh..." I could hear her debating with herself. "Emily told me she likes you,"

"Jay, don't lie to me out of pity, please,"

"I'm not! I told her I wouldn't tell you, but she really does. I think you should just go for it, ask her out,"

"Stop, JJ, this is just cruel,"

"I'm not lying, Lina, just talk to her."

-

Apparently, JJ got off the phone with me and Emily called her. "JJ!"

"Let me guess," sighed JJ. She smiled and shook her head.

"What?" asked Emily, madly confused. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing, why'd you call?" asked JJ. Emily furrowed her brow.

"JJ, what did you mean?"

"Nothing, Emily, just tell me what's wrong, you sound upset,"

"I think I really fucked up. I think she...I think she knows I like her,"

"Don't you want to be with her?" JJ clarified. Emily sighed.

"Yeah, but...I don't know, I don't know if she wants me, and I really can't fuck things up with her, JJ, I can't lose her..."

"Emily, you're not gonna lose her. She likes you too. She's told me as much. You know how you're telling me about your hopeless pining? Yeah, I got off the phone with her five minutes ago, she's doing the exact same thing with me,"

"JJ. That's not funny,"

"God, she said the exact same thing. Why can neither of you believe that you both want to be together?"

-

At work we couldn't make eye contact, and seeing JJ with Emily terrified me. JJ wouldn't betray me, right? She wouldn't tell Emily of my love?

I avoided her as discreetly as I could, sitting in Garcia's cave for a while and talking about our families. I went to the bathroom at some point, running out on conversation topics.

My patience was running thin; it's quite difficult to avoid the love of your life when you work within fifteen feet of each other. I was tired of running.

Why couldn't Emily just ask me out already? She probably didn't even like me. I would have to get over this. Clearly getting over things wasn't my strong suit, but I would have to, wouldn't I?

As I'm giving myself a mental pep talk in the mirror, I hear the bathroom door swing open and the white lights of the hall coming in. The woman from whom I'd been trying to hide was now in the bathroom with me.

"Hey," she said. I just thought she was pitying me, that JJ had told her about my feelings. "You still doing alright?"

"What? Oh, yeah, thanks,"

"Good." Emily gave me a nod. I turned back at the mirror and started to wash my hands. Something to do. "Listen, I—I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable this morning. I shouldn't have said that. It was out of turn. I'm sorry. I don't want us to be like this, it sucks." I finally looked at her with a quizzical, slightly pained look.

"Like what?"

"Come on, Karimova. We've been avoiding each other since we got to work." I dropped my facade. "I hate not talking to you."

Emily stepped closer. I didn't move away. "It's okay, Emily. I don't care. You looked good, you look good."

Every word I regretted but somehow I couldn't stop.

I continued. Emily seemed taken aback. "If you think I look good, I don't care if you comment on it. You weren't rude. I hope I wasn't."

I took a step towards her with a smile to hide my anxiety. "Sorry." I stopped at last. She was looking between my lips and my eyes.

We began to close the space between us, her hands on my arms just above my elbows, our lips about to meet, when my phone rang in my pocket. Cockblocked.

I'd been gone from my desk for a while, and we had a case. I sighed, and Emily and I pulled far away from one another. "Yeah, Garcia?"