Red, White & Royal Blue Stories

• Try to be a Rainbow in Someone's Cloud • Henry § Philip •

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• ———— •

Henry looked down at the small, rainbow flag sitting in his hands. He had made it himself with felt, glued together haphazardly, yet it did the trick nonetheless. It made him smile. For a brief moment in his sixteen years of living, he could be happy with himself.

Coming to the realisation he was gay wasn't an easy task. It was countered with deeply rooted homophobia, horror, gushes of immobilising anxiety and tsunamis of overwhelming sadness.

He still wishes with all his might he was normal; he was straight, because even coming to the conclusion he was as gay as a maypole didn't mean anything; it didn't mean he could act on these feelings; it certainly didn't mean he'd marry a loving husband one day.

It meant he'd have to suffer with a wife, and watch her suffer too because of it.

But, with some luck, he might not have to suffer with it alone.

A week later he was sitting in the seats at Wimbledon. His sister, Beatrice, beside him, throwing gummy worms into her mouth. (She had managed to sneak them in). Beside her were their parents, Catherine and Arther, smiling politely while murmuring about the game playing out before them.

To his other side was Philip, obviously watching the game with great interest.

His eyes slid back to the field. He couldn't say he was interested, he didn't know which team was winning, all he wanted to know was how long of the game remained and how many breaks he could take without it appearing obvious he'd rather do anything else with his time.

However, he knew he was just stalling. He knew what he came here to do and if he didn't get on with it, he might just shoot himself in the foot. Philip had come down from university for a week's break, today was his second to last day, his ride back started early tomorrow morning.

It was literally now or never.

"Philip?"

He looks over momentarily, "yes?"

"May I speak with you? Privately?" He whispers.

Philip looked surprised at the question but nodded regardless. The game suddenly mattered much less when Henry gave him such a desperate look.

Giving a mild excuse to the others they both stood up and left their royally sectioned area, two guards trailing behind them as they walked through the halls and into the private bathrooms allocated for their family.

Once inside, Henry locked the door to be safe and let out a deep breath.

"What's going on, Hen?" Philip asks, standing beside the sinks.

Henry walked over to him, resting his palms against the cool countertop. One glance to the mirrors and he could see how panicked he appeared.

"I need to tell you something. And you need to promise to not... tell anyone. More importantly, you need to promise not to be mad" he explains, Philip nodded slowly.

"Christ, have you done something?" He worries.

Henry snorted, "what could I have possibly done?"

Philip shrugged, "I don't know. You might've..." he gestures vaguely.

Henry stared at him blankly, "very informative" he says drily.

Philip scowled, "oh get on with it then, will you? I promise I won't do either of those things" he says, and Henry believes him.

He let his eyes fall back down to the white counter, clenching air. "Pip, I... I think I'm- gay" he blurts, squeezing his eyes shut.

Philip remained silent for too long. Henry tensed, expecting him to roar with rage, but instead two arms wrapped around his side and tugged him into a warm chest. He almost burst into tears then and there but managed to refrain, somehow.

"Henry" Philip whispers, "mad at you? Why would I ever be mad at you for something like this?"

Henry shrugged, he didn't have the words to respond.

"Thank you for telling me. And trusting me. That... Christ, it must've been hard" Philip frowns, slowly letting Henry go. He leaned up and nodded, a bit breathless, shocked but relieved all the same.

"Yeah. Definitely...I thought you'd hate me, after all gran isn't exactly shooting rainbows out of her arse for the gay community" he points out. Philip let out a startled laugh.

"Certainly not," he agrees, "I'll admit, I did... agree with her. Before I went to university. I had my head pulled out of my arse before I had the chance to prevent it" he chuckles, crossing his arms. "I support you, Hen. It won't be easy for you, especially with our... lives" he winces, "but I'll stand with you forever"

Henry beamed, laugh watery as he tried to grab a hold of himself.

"Thank you, Pip- I-... thank you"

"You're my brother, H. My annoying, younger brother" he jokes, Henry rolled his eyes and shoved him lightly. "Course I'll support you"

Henry relaxed, sharing one more side hug before they returned to their seats and finished watching the game.

Henry knew it would be hard, he was still prepared to keep this side of himself a secret for the rest of his life. But, with Pip supporting him, it definitely made things much, much easier.

• ———— •
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